Dad jokes and Bad jokes. One in the same

[LynahFan]

Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding up in trees?
- They’re really good at it.


Why do elephants paint their balls red?
- So they can hide in cherry trees.

What’s the loudest noise in the forest?
- Giraffes eating cherries.

 

[Kepler]

 

[St. Clown]

A man and a woman are on a first date, and the man asks his date, “You’re given a choice, you’re offered $50,000 but the person you hate most in life is given $100,000, would you take the offer?”

The woman replies, “Yes! Why wouldn’t I want $150,000?”

 

[Kepler]

A man and a woman are on a first date, and the man asks his date, “You’re given a choice, you’re offered $50,000 but the person you hate most in life is given $100,000, would you take the offer?”

The woman replies, “Yes! Why wouldn’t I want $150,000?”

This is kinda the opposite of a Dad joke.

 

[MissThundercat]

When it comes to puns about eyes, the cornea the better.

 

[MissThundercat]

Someone has been stealing the wheels off cop cars.

Police have been working tirelessly to catch them.

 

[burd]

Punqueen, MT.

 

[MissThundercat]

Her: I have a daddy kink.

Me: *mows lawn at 7 AM in socks and sandals*

 

[MissThundercat]

I completely misunderstood Pride month. Who wants to buy 15 lions?

 

[St. Clown]

Will Ferrell and Marky Mark reading dad jokes. My apologies if this is a repost.

https://youtu.be/SAgYiERRDPY

 

[wolverineTrumpet]

Always give 100%, unless you're giving blood

 

[wolverineTrumpet]

Did you know Mortal Kombat is a prayer in Scandinavia?

It's a Finnish Hymn

 

[MissThundercat]

My parents, 1999: Be careful. Not everything on the internet is true.

My parents, 2023: If I copy and paste a bunch of legal sounding nonsense, Facebook won't be able to sell my private data!

 

[MissThundercat]

Grandmother: All of our family history is stored in this book.

Me: That's the DSM-V, Grandma!

 

[MissThundercat]

*check engine light comes on*

Okay.

*opens hood*

Yep, still there.

 

[St. Clown]

I have several dad jokes about unemployment, but none of them work.

 

[St. Clown]

There’s a very fine line between a numerator and a denominator, but only a fraction will understand.

 

[wolverineTrumpet]

Where do bad rainbows go?


Prism
It's a light sentence
Gives them time to reflect

 

[Kepler]

Where do bad rainbows go?


Prism
It's a light sentence
Gives them time to reflect

Jesus f-ck, this is peak dad joke.

 

[LynahFan]

Where do bad rainbows go?


Prism
It's a light sentence
Gives them time to reflect

Not foolproof, but works for a large spectrum.