What's new
By:
USCHO Fan Forum

This is a sample guest message. Register a free account today to become a member! Once signed in, you'll be able to participate on this site by adding your own topics and posts, as well as connect with other members through your own private inbox!

  • The USCHO Fan Forum has migrated to a new plaform, xenForo. Most of the function of the forum should work in familiar ways. Please note that you can switch between light and dark modes by clicking on the gear icon in the upper right of the main menu bar. We are hoping that this new platform will prove to be faster and more reliable. Please feel free to explore its features.

A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

My friends are like:

Friend 1: "I got promoted!"
Friend 2: "I got engaged!"
Friend 3: "I'm pregnant!"

And I'm over here: "One more punch on my rewards card and I get a free coffee!"
 
Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

"Hey, Dad (or Mom, whatever...), what did you do at work today?"

Parent who works in IT: "I watched a blue line go from left to right across a screen all day."
 
Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

Oh sure, everyone says they want to keep Christmas traditional. But when I dress up as the Krampus, put their brats in a sack and beat them with reeds, suddenly I've gone too far.
 
Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

ShirtlessBob said:
Oh sure, everyone says they want to keep Christmas traditional. But when I dress up as the Krampus, put their brats in a sack and beat them with reeds, suddenly I've gone too far.
Click to expand...

That's only because Krampus comes on the 5th, not 25th. You have to get the date right, then everyone's fine with it. Also, you need to follow the rules upon which children are taken because not all qualify.
 
Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

What do you call mixing coffee with hard liquor?

Getting ready for work.
 
Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

What do you get when you cross a cow with an octopus?

A visit with the Ethics Committee and an immediate withdrawal of your funding.
 
Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

Chronically red nose, can stay up all night, peers find him obnoxious... are we sure Rudolph isn't strung out on cocaine?
 
Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

ShirtlessBob said:
Chronically red nose, can stay up all night, peers find him obnoxious... are we sure Rudolph isn't strung out on cocaine?
Click to expand...

Thinks he can fly. A hit with the does.
 
I'm opening a gym called "Resolutions." It will have exercise equipment the first two weeks of the year, then it will be transformed into a bar."
 
Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

Me at age 25: why do adults like HGTV?
Now: Tile floors with THOSE cabinets? What's your problem, lady?
 
Re: A light bulb, a door-to-door jokester and a geneticist walk into a bar ...

Brenthoven said:
3 people walk into a bar. One's a vegan, one's a marathoner, and one does Pilates. Who talks first?
Click to expand...
Being a marathon runner and someone who practices yoga and Pilates, I bet I talk before the vegan.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top