The Night People
vs.
"Creeping Meatballism"
IN THE LANGUAGE OF "DAY PEOPLE", I suppose "Night People" may be called many things. Like "soreheads", "wise-guys", "egg-heads", "long-hairs", "outsiders", etc. Whatever they're called, the fact remains they're a genuine phenomenon. They're the people who refuse to be taken in by the "Day World" philosophy of "Creeping Meatballism."
The average person today thinks in certain prescribed patterns. People today have a genuine fear of stepping out and thinking on their own. "Creeping Meatballism" is this rejection of individuality. It's conformity. The American brags about being a great individualist, when actually he's the world's least individual person. The idea of thinking individually has become a big joke. Old Thomas J. Watson of I.B.M. came up with the idea for a sign which just said: "Think". And today, it's a gag! This is the result of "Creeping Meatballism". The guy who has been taken in by the "Meatball" philosophy is the guy who really believes that contemporary people are slim, and clean-limbed, and they're so much fun to be with. . . .because they drink Pepsi-Cola. As long as he believes this, he's in the clutches of "Creeping Meatballism". He's a "Day People". Let me give you some examples of "Creeping Meatballism" at work. . .
WE'LL TAKE SOMETHING THAT'S artistically interesting, and then, because we like it, we'll overdo it ten times, thereby destroying it. Like for example when Cadillac first came out with those little tail fins. Everybody thought it was great. Guys with Chevies and Pontiacs went out and bought phony tail fins which they tagged on, and all the car manufacturers began to see that there was a "thing" here. So the next thing you know, every car has fins.
Couple of years ago, we had a horsepower competition. Now it's a fin competition.
In the "Day World", the car with the highest and longest fin is the car everybody's interested in.
I GO INTO A DRUGSTORE TO BUY a small tube of toothpaste for my travelling kit, which is the only size it will take, and I say, "I want a small tube of toothpaste." And the clerk says, "Okay," and he gives me this tube, and on the side it says "large", so I say, "What's this? I want the small one!" And he says, "That is the small one!" And I say, "It says here . . .'large'!" And he's getting irritated because I'm beginning to probe into his psyche. This has bothered him a little bit, but he's never said anything before. "Well . . . the 'large' is the smallest they make!", he says. Which means it is totally impossible in the "Day World" to buy anything that's "small." Even if you try.
TODAY, EVERYTHING HAS A BADGE. Take men's suits. I go into Macy's basement, where they sell cheap men's clothing. (And incidentally, they don't call them "Cheap", they call them "Budget-Minded".) And they have this big rack of men's suits. And it says "Custom Brand". And I say, "Custom designed suits? Who are they designed for? I thought 'Custom designed' means designed for an individual." And the salesman says, "Well, you see. . .they're designed for us . . .the basement." That means, it's impossible in the "Day World" to buy a standard rack suit. All suits are custom designed. Even if they're designed for the rack, and they fit the hangers beautifully.
TODAY, NO MAN IS WITHOUT A MEDAL. I know of a department store where they had all "Day People" working, and these people began to rail at being called "employees". There's something about being called an "employee" which makes you sound like a second-rate citizen. So the guys upstairs started to think about this, and they figured the best thing to do was to change the name. So now, all the people who work at this particular department store are no longer called "employees", but "associates". And everybody's happy. They've had about a 25% decrease in quittings, fist fights, etc. Because they're "associates" now. It's impossible to be an employee there.
Just as it's impossible to buy a car without fins, or a small tube of toothpaste or a standard rack suit.
HERE'S A WONDERFUL EXAMPLE of "Creeping Meatballism." On "Wide Wide World" one week, they took these cameras down to Florida, and they said, "A lot of you people have never been to Florida, and you want to know how Florida looks, so here's Florida!" And they showed all these palm trees and girls in bathing suits. And it looked like Florida. Only what happened was, when they took these cameras down and set them up, it didn't look like the way they thought Florida should look. So they actually went out and got twenty-five prop palm trees and set them all around, and got some girls to walk around in bathing suits, even though nobody wore bathing suits in that part of Florida.
And all the meatballs all over the country sat there and said, "Yeah, by George, there's Florida all right! That's the way Florida looks." Which means that "Creeping Meatballism" has taken hold of geography.
THERE IS A GREAT DEAL OF CONFUSION about what is progress. I think one of the fine examples between "Night People" and "Day People" can be observed when they both watch Betty Furness do a commercial for Westinghouse. You know the one where she says "Another new miracle has been wrought! Mankind once again progresses! The new Westinghouse refrigerator for 1957 opens from both sides!" Well, a "Day People" sitting there says, "By George, we really are getting ahead!" And he feels great. He can see Mankind taking another significant step up that great pyramid of civilization. But a "Night People" watching this thing can't quite figure out what's the advantage of a refrigerator which opens from both sides. All he wants to know is, "Does it keep the stuff cold?"
He's not quite sure there's been any great mark of progress, while there's still wars and stuff going on!
I WAS LISTENING THE OTHER DAY to an ad, and the guy was saying the car he was selling was designed like a jet plane. And I said to myself, "A jet plane is a beautiful thing. Sounds great." Until I suddenly realized: What relationship does a jet plane have with a car that spends most of its time banging into fire hydrants on 59th street, or piddling along at eight miles an hour in cross-town traffic? Why, it shouldn't look like a jet plane at all! It should look like one of those rubber-bumpered things they have in amusement parks! That's the ideal car for traffic! What possible advantage would a jet plane have for a guy on Clark Street in Chicago? It would be like designing a house to look like a Spanish Galleon. Everybody likes the looks of those, so you might as well live in one.
EVERY ONE OF US, I don't care who he is, has a certain amount of "Night People" in him. Because, no matter how many refrigerators you buy from Betty Furness, no matter how many "custom" suits you buy, no matter how many cars with fins you buy, you're still an individual.
And I'll say this: Once a guy starts thinking, once a guy starts laughing at the things he once thought were very real, once he starts laughing at T.V. commercials, once he starts getting a boot out of movie trailers, once he begins to realize that just because a movie is wider or higher or longer doesn't make it a better movie, once a guy starts doing that, he's making the transition from "Day People" to "Night People."
And once this happens, he can never go back!
