Really Terrible Puns, v 10

[MissThundercat]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

If you see a monk selling flowers, say something. Remember, only you can prevent florist friars.

 

[owslachief]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

If you see a monk selling flowers, say something. Remember, only you can prevent florist friars.

Say "that's a bad habit you've gotten yourself into"?

 

[MissThundercat]

I had to quit my job crushing pop cans. It was soda pressing.

 

[MissThundercat]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

Not really a pun, but I don't know where else to put this:

A gingerbread man sits inside a gingerbread house. Is the house made of flesh? Or is he made of house? He screams, for he does not know.

 

[unofan]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

http://www.fark.com/comments/9416308/Farks-2016-Headline-of-Year-contest-Puns-Wordplay-headlines

Finalists for Fark.com's pun and wordplay headlines of the year.

 

[MissThundercat]

Did you hear about the guy who stole a calendar?

He got 12 months.

 

[MissThundercat]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/54862062@N08/31082548554/in/dateposted-public/" title="pun"><img src="https://c3.staticflickr.com/1/698/31082548554_c515c653db.jpg" width="493" height="395" alt="pun"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

 

[Jimjamesak]

I had to quit my job crushing pop cans. It was soda pressing.

Made me think of this video and the website puns.

Enjoy the art of steak? Raremediumdonewell.com
Wanna meet vegan ladies? Nevermetherbivore.com
Need to build an ark? Inoahguy.com

 

[MissThundercat]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

Did you hear about the man who was cooled to absolute zero?

He's 0K now.

 

[MissThundercat]

I used to hate math, then realized decimals had a point.

And..

We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.

 

[joecct]

I used to hate math, then realized decimals had a point.

And..

We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.

The students' motto: Divide and conquer!!

 

[MissThundercat]

The students' motto: Divide and conquer!!

And subtract them one by one?

 

[MissThundercat]

I saw you looking at those shoes, so I bought you a pear.

 

[MissThundercat]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

The arrogant math teacher finally ate a slice of humble pi.

The math teacher was a good dancer- he had algorithm.

 

[MissThundercat]

People have been asking what I'm doing in 3 years. Guys, please, I don't have 2020 vision.

 

[NEWI Badger Fan]

Ever since I started sleeping at night in a tupperware container, I wake up feeling much fresher.

 

[NEWI Badger Fan]

I love the way the Earth rotates. It really makes my day.

 

[MissThundercat]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

If you put a shampoo like product on a violin, does that make it a classical conditioner?

 

[jericho]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

I love the way the Earth rotates. It really makes my day.

Just when you think you're going to rise above, here comes gravity to pull you back down.

 

[MissThundercat]

I don't trust stairs because they're always up to something