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The States : red states in a race to the bottom

Deutsche Gopher Fan said:
Day one of the fair tomorrow. Per tradition, going for a few hours morning one with a family member to see if they won any ribbons

My list:
Ham and cheese crepe
Corn
Paella
Raspberry malt from dairy barn
Swedes in a blanket

Fuck sweet Martha’s, so overrated
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My wife is related to Sweet Martha, so I might be biased…
1) She is truly a sweet woman.
2) Her cookies are only decent for the first 5 minutes out of the oven. After that, they’re horrible.
3) Almost all chocolate chip cookies - made from even an low-grade-okay-recipe - are decent when first coming out of the oven.
 
Slap Shot said:
You need a new bit not shitting on everything. You make Kepler look agreeable. ;)

Yeah they're just cookies yet some people feel like they have to scream "OMG THEY'RE NOT THE GREATEST" when no one is saying "OMG THEY'RE THE GREATEST". They're solid chocolate chip cookies and when in the mood hit the spot. Ohs noes!!!

Also 99% of this is tongue-in-cheek me boi.
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Have you seen their prices the last couple years? There needs to be a competitor that can batch out in volume because they’re kind of nuts right now, even by MN State Fair standards. I used to be more reserved in my opinion, but the prices have just gone crazy.
 
https://www.wusf.org/education/2025...-of-completion-for-students-with-disabilities

The Florida Board of Education voted to sunset certificates of completion for students with disabilities who attend K-12 school. These certificates were awarded to students who couldn't complete the coursework needed for a diploma.

The change starts this year under a new Florida law (HB 1105). Students with severe disabilities who can't earn a standard high school diploma will leave school without any formal recognition upon graduation.

Amy Van Bergen ran the Down Syndrome Association of Central Florida and is also the mom of a son with disabilities. She said her son wouldn't have been able to get the two jobs he works at a law office without his certificate, and she's worried for other students like him.

People with disabilities already have a higher rate of unemployment and a lower rate of job placement after school.

"Without that certificate, they are potentially going to lose eligibility to all sorts of opportunities after high school, whether that's even taking a college placement test or pursuing developmental or vocational programs," said Van Bergen.
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Step one towards the black triangle.
 
St. Clown said:
My wife is related to Sweet Martha, so I might be biased…
1) She is truly a sweet woman.
2) Her cookies are only decent for the first 5 minutes out of the oven. After that, they’re horrible.
3) Almost all chocolate chip cookies - made from even a low-grade-okay-recipe - are decent when first coming out of the oven.
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Can’t argue with any of that! Probably not any cookie I’d prioritize at the fair- I want my calories spent on other things- not in a diet sense, but in that I can’t pig out as I get older amd simply fill up faster

To handys point, the gluttony can be gross. I basically only eat the crepe, paella, corn, and raspberry milkshake. None of them are completely finished
 
St. Clown said:
My wife is related to Sweet Martha, so I might be biased…
1) She is truly a sweet woman.
2) Her cookies are only decent for the first 5 minutes out of the oven. After that, they’re horrible.
3) Almost all chocolate chip cookies - made from even an low-grade-okay-recipe - are decent when first coming out of the oven.
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I have heard she is great...I knew some people that worked for her and never regretted it.
 
Ok, one last comment word wall. I’m a chocolate chip cookie snob through and through.

I have my own recipes I’ve created from scratch and honed over the years. So when it comes to chocolate chip cookies of varying types, I’m pretty critical.

If a toll house is the standard bearer recipe (which, yeah, it should be. It’s a damn good recipe that has stood the test of time for a reason), it gets a 5 to set the bar. My best cookie gets somewhere around an 8.5-9. Sweet Martha’s is a 3.5-4 in my book.

You need a proper butter-flour ratio or the cookies don’t have the structure to hold themselves upright. You need eggs to give them a bit of cohesiveness and if you do it right, a bit of lift as well making them a hair less dense and giving a better bite. The brown sugar helps to retain moisture and give them a chewiness (I use exclusively brown for this reason). White sugar gives them crispiness but I think it lacks flavor and only use it when the texture requires it. Some recipes add milk for protein and moisture allowing for browning.

But IMO their ratios are off. It’s basically like using 60:40 beef to make a burger. Like, sure, it’s going to taste good going down, but it’s not enjoyable after 15 minute because it’s just too greasy. It’s also why their cookies are flat and have no real bite. The white sugar, once it cools enough, creates the meteorite as hovey aptly named it. I also wouldn’t be surprised if they used a higher ratio of yolks to whites to give it that initial brownie-like structure that quickly fades as the white sugar sets.

Everything needs balance and Sweet Martha’s are like a symphony orchestra with two dozen timpani.

Like everyone says though, out of the oven, I’m hard-pressed to think of any chocolate chip cookie with a half-competent recipe as below a 5. It’s just a perfect little dessert.
 
Looking at this years' "new" foods, I'd be up for:

-Hula Kalua Pork Collars
-Pimento Cheese Puffs
-Timber Twists
-Tandoori Chicken Quesoratha
-Jerk Oxtail
-Dill Pickle Iced Tea
-Dirty No-Tini

Maybe some Banana French Toast Lumpia for a dessert.

Yeah, I have a salt problem. Sue me.

The Bison Meatball Sub could've been intriguing, but it appears to have too many superfluous toppings, and using gravy with pickles and sour cream is just gross. It should be BBQ meatballs, a sub roll. and maybe the pickles to give the meat an acidic contrast. That's it.

One of these years, I will take my wife up there during the Fair. We can just order one of everything we want, she'll take 2-3 bites and I'll have to finish the rest. 😂
 
Slap Shot said:
From cookies and milk? 🤣 🤣 🤣

So you've never even partaken but are so sure it's bad.

Whatever they're cookies - enough has been said to care.
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Are you ok?

I have had cookies and milk at The Fair...its not some phucking transcendent experience. And I stopped drinking milk in my twenties because it tastes like crap and humans were never meant to drink it into adulthood.
 
Handyman said:
Can you imagine the people watching at the Florida State Fair...I mean think of what Florida normally is and ramp it up to infinity!
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Was gonna make a meth joke

For some reason, this reminds me that my sister and I saw a certain brother of someone we once knew as we left the gopher building yesterday. We remained incognito
 
FadeToBlack&Gold said:
Looking at this years' "new" foods, I'd be up for:

-Hula Kalua Pork Collars
-Pimento Cheese Puffs
-Timber Twists
-Tandoori Chicken Quesoratha
-Jerk Oxtail
-Dill Pickle Iced Tea
-Dirty No-Tini

Maybe some Banana French Toast Lumpia for a dessert.
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None of that says "fair food" to me.

What kind of liberal elitist fair your state running anyway? They got a ocado toast too?
 
rufus said:
None of that says "fair food" to me.

What kind of liberal elitist fair your state running anyway? They got a ocado toast too?
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Yeah, I know you’re joking, but…

Fair staples are all very abundant, with many vendors offering the same things throughout the whole things. At the same time, we have some people who want really fun, interesting options. We have an entire corner of the fair dedicated to international foods, and similar scattered throughout the rest of the grounds. I think the slide into offering so many varied foods began around the turn of the century.
 
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