Really Terrible Puns, v 10

[joecct]

Hey Joe, I was looking at this X-ray of your upper arm, and I found this humerus.

But I have a big radius.

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

She does everything at full speed.

He does everything half-fast.

 

[MissThundercat]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

David lost his ID, so now we just call him Dave.

 

[MissThundercat]

I was fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.

 

[MissThundercat]

A: What are you planting?
B: The seed of doubt.
A: That's the worst idea ever.
A: Or is it the best?

 

[joecct]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

If attacked by a mob of clowns, go for the juggler.

 

[joecct]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

I was addicted to the Hokey Pokey, but I turned myself around.

 

[jericho]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

Recently, I was in an airport and overheard some people who were picking up someone arriving from Anchorage.

"Juneau what flight she was on?" asked one.
"I don't know, but Alaska employee."

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

A: What are you planting?
B: The seed of doubt.
A: That's the worst idea ever.
A: Or is it the best?

Seen on a T-shirt: "I used to be undecided, but now I'm not so sure..."

 

[MissThundercat]

Some aquatic mammals escaped from the zoo today. It's otter chaos.

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

Some aquatic mammals escaped from the zoo today. It's otter chaos.

That's a whale of a story! Did they have to seal off the area to catch them?

and what porpoise did it serve?

 

[MissThundercat]

Be sure to pay your exorcist. Otherwise, you get repossessed.

 

[MissThundercat]

A book fell on my head. I blame my shelf.

 

[FlagDUDE08]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

No matter how many manners and actions of chivalry you teach, German children will always be kinder.

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

A book fell on my head. I blame my shelf.

Don't be too hard on yourself. After all, to err is hunam.

 

[joecct]

Don't be too hard on yourself. After all, to err is hunam.

Did General Tso say that?

 

[MissThundercat]

Parasite (N): what you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.

 

[The Sicatoka]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

Parasite (N): what you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.

Next you'll be telling me my paradigm is $0.20.

 

[MissThundercat]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One's heavy, and the other is a little lighter.

 

[RENCEB]

Re: Really Terrible Puns, v 10

I was addicted to the Hokey Pokey, but I turned myself around.

What if the Hokey Pokey really IS what it's all about?