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New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

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Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

"The surprise" is not that important. For whatever combination of psychological illnesses I knew exactly where the movie was going within the first 15 minutes, but I still thoroughly enjoyed it.

It's great just standing on its own, but if you've wasted a few thousand hours of your life watching the genre, it is immense fun. It's sort of a love letter to the entire history of horror films.
You liked Cabin in the Woods? Handy's going to hate it.
 
Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

I thought Brent was my movie evil twin?

I'm not a big horror movie guy, so this Cabin in the Woods is out of form for me. If it has decent suspense (Halloween, Night Of The Living Dead, Blair Witch), then yeah, I'd like it. Movies like Saw and Hostel and that slasher ultraviolent crap I don't care for.

Exception: something that is supposed to be a horrible movie, such as Planet Terror.
 
Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

I'm not a big horror movie guy, so this Cabin in the Woods is out of form for me. If it has decent suspense (Halloween, Night Of The Living Dead, Blair Witch), then yeah, I'd like it. Movies like Saw and Hostel and that slasher ultraviolent crap I don't care for.

Exception: something that is supposed to be a horrible movie, such as Planet Terror.
I like the psychological / puzzle aspects of horror movies. I tolerate the blood because that's how you sell enough tickets to make the movie. So put it this way: The Cabin in the Woods has tons of spraying gore but you don't need to see much of it. At this point I selectively edit as I'm watching anyway -- I don't think I've seen an arterial money shot in ten years.

Just my opinion, but I do not think the original Saw and Hostel should be grouped together. Saw had a (very frightening) logic and philosophy behind it, had suspense and good characters, and it had a good mystery that lasted right to the final moment. Hostel was gross, depressing, soul-deadening Torture Porn -- if it hadn't been Roth (who made the very sharp and interesting Cabin Fever), I'd have thought it was a hackjob churned out by some studio factory with a computer script.
 
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Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

I like the psychological / puzzle aspects of horror movies. I tolerate the blood because that's how you sell enough tickets to make the movie. So put it this way: The Cabin in the Woods has tons of spraying gore but you don't need to see much of it. At this point I selectively edit as I'm watching anyway -- I don't think I've seen an arterial money shot in ten years.

Just my opinion, but I do not think the original Saw and Hostel should be grouped together. Saw had a (very frightening) logic and philosophy behind it, had suspense and good characters, and it had a good mystery that lasted right to the final moment. Hostel was gross, depressing, soul-deadening Torture Porn -- if it hadn't been Roth (who made the very sharp and interesting Cabin Fever), I'd have thought it was a hackjob churned out by some studio factory with a computer script.

Fair enough.
 
Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

Just my opinion, but I do not think the original Saw and Hostel should be grouped together. Saw had a (very frightening) logic and philosophy behind it, had suspense and good characters, and it had a good mystery that lasted right to the final moment. Hostel was gross, depressing, soul-deadening Torture Porn -- if it hadn't been Roth (who made the very sharp and interesting Cabin Fever), I'd have thought it was a hackjob churned out by some studio factory with a computer script.

Ok Hostel was terrible...but Saw was downright laughable. I love Cary Elwes in most things but his ridiculousness in the flick along witht he stupid plot and terrible acting made the movie laugh out loud funny and not in the good way. I guess compared to most of the shlock that comes out these days in the genre it was ok but otherwise the movie was downright atrocious. I have seen second rate zombie movies that were more enjoyable to watch. (and I hate zombies)
 
Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

I have seen second rate zombie movies that were more enjoyable to watch. (and I hate zombies)
We'll agree to disagree about Saw; I thought it was quite good. I agree about zombies, though. They have been done to death.

zombies : adolescent boys :: vampires : adolescent girls
 
Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

A Dangerous Method

Odd movie about Freud/Jung/Speilrien. At times it's brilliant, other times horribly done. Keira Knightley's horribleness/brilliance varies by the minute, honestly. When she's first introduced, she's amazing. After that, start flipping a coin. Viggo is solid as Freud, Fassbender is more than passable as Jung, and you already heard about Keira as Speilrein.

I don't know how many liberties were taken with the movie, but I've found it's been generally true to form. It's interesting in that aspect. The director just did a subpar job bringing it all together, IMO. The dialogue? Excellent. How the story unfolds? Rather shoddy, IMO.

If you want to learn the story, by all means watch it. If you know the story, you could probably skip it.
 
Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

Saw Bobcat Goldthwait's God Bless America, which I had been looking forward to.

Short verdict: It seems like an adaptation of a message board rant. Which is kind of the point, I realize . . . but it's not a good thing for a feature-length film when maximum impact happens in the first 10 minutes, with the rest of the film a long gradual decline. Like Bill Maher's Religulous, I'd say it's also a bit too self-assured for its own good. There are fun moments, no question. And the central argument is about right. Contemporary society sucks. But does it suck this badly? This is great self-indulgence. Great filmmaking? Probably not.

Maybe the best way to recommend the film is this: If you suffer transient bouts of misanthropy the way others catch colds, this is the equivalent of a couple of aspirin.

Basically, watch this film if these two scenes seem interesting (highlight to reveal)

Scene 1
Angry guy storms into neighbor's house, gun in hand. Mother holds up screaming infant to shield herself, not knowing that it's the infant that he's come for. Guy aims . . . fires . . . infant explodes. Camera zooms in for money shot, then pulls back to reveal mother drenched in infant blood, "Carrie"-style.

Scene 2
Angry guy driving car, misfit teenaged girl riding shotgun. After passing a Westboro Baptist-style rally, misfit girl leans out of car window, spraying the Westborons, starting with the kids.


Or just watch the trailer.
<iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/ul4CZrnEFxU" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
 
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Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

Keira Knightley's horribleness/brilliance varies by the minute, honestly. When she's first introduced, she's amazing. After that, start flipping a coin.
That's great. :)
 
Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

I dont get why anyone finds her attractive...a strong wind would blow her five states away and she has the face of a goblin. Oh yeah, and she is a horrible actress and stands out for it even in movies with other horrible actresses. she is like a less talented, less attractive Natalie Portman.

I mean Jesus her acting would be horrible even by Attack of the Clones standards :eek:
 
Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

I dont get why anyone finds her attractive...a strong wind would blow her five states away and she has the face of a goblin. Oh yeah, and she is a horrible actress and stands out for it even in movies with other horrible actresses. she is like a less talented, less attractive Natalie Portman.

I mean Jesus her acting would be horrible even by Attack of the Clones standards :eek:
We live in a world where Cher was considered pretty and Julia Roberts was considered talented. Why are you trying to make sense of it?
 
Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

Boo first twenty minutes of Taken. Get to the part where he starts beating up half of Paris.
 
Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

Boo first twenty minutes of Taken. Get to the part where he starts beating up half of Paris.

There has to be SOME sort of plot. It's like porn. "Ok, um, get Liam mad. Then he can go kick ass."

Watched "Before The Devil Knows You're Dead." Had potential. Crime drama with Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Ethan Hawke, and Marisa Tomei. Well, Marisa's role was to basically be at least topless in every scene and whine a little, Ethan's role was to be a wimpy incompetent beech, and PSH's role was to be an white collar arrogant druggie crazy man. There's no need to expand on those characters, since that is all you get. Whee.

I wouldn't even bother seeing this.
 
Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

If that had been the very first episode of Community I probably would have never watched another.
 
Re: New/Rented Movies: Have Mercy on Michael Bay's Soul, He Knows Not What He Does

In The Land Of Blood And Honey.

Meh. Just meh. Nothing great nor terrible about it. There's a war, and there's personal conflicts in said war. Surprise.
 
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