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122 Franchises Ranked Bottom to Top:

CommAvHusky

Active member
Once upon time, a certain someone ranked all the professional franchises based on their championship history and much hilarity ensued. I feel it appropriate to do a redux since its 2017, and times have changed so its high time to revisit this. Number 122 will be come up shortly.
 
Re: 122 Franchises Ranked Bottom to Top:

Shouldn't it be 123? Unless we're just going to ignore the Golden Knights #1 all-time winning percentage of 1.000.
 
Re: 122 Franchises Ranked Bottom to Top:

122. Los Angeles Clippers

aka....San Diego Clippers, Buffalo Braves,

Why?...Before 2011, this organization was the biggest joke in professional sports. The Clips have since moved up to mid-card status in the NBA with the additions of Blake Griffin and Chris Paul.

The Good....They once knocked out the Spurs in the first round of the playoffs.

The Bad....They never knocked anyone out in the second round of the playoffs.

The Ugly....they forced the teams owner Donald Sterling to sell the team due to his history of sexual and racial discrimination.

Where they play? Staples Center, where they are fourth biggest attraction after the Lakers, Kings, and Sparks but do get a nice discount on office supplies

Owner: Steve Ballmer who did Microsoft Stuff

Coach: Doc Rivers, who btw is not a doctor or a body of water

Top Current Player: Blake Griffin who I feel would make a funny Family Guy cameo

Hall of Famer...Bill Walton disappeared while playing for the Clippers before his previous life with the Trailblazers and his later life with the '86 Celtics
 
Re: 122 Franchises Ranked Bottom to Top:

121. Seattle Mariners



Why?...Took almost 20 seasons in existence before having a winning season. Has largely been irrelevant for the past 15 seasons.

The Good....They once won 116 games in one season.

The Bad....They never won the pennant.

The Ugly....Nintendo owns 10 percent of the team, yet no one ever named Mario was ever super on the Mariners.

Where they play? Safeco Field (until next year). When the original Kingdome was falling apart, ownership threatened to move. Originally the public rejected funding for a new stadium. When the Mariners went to the playoffs for the first time, the public changed their mind.

Owner: John W. Stantion owns 90 percent of the team, making his money doing wireless stuff.

Manager: Scott Servais, a journeyman catcher in the 90's in his second season managing the Mariners

Top Current Player: Felix Hernandez, it should be noted that 90% of his body is covered in a neck tattoo

Hall of Famer...Ken Griffey Jr., Jr made the Mariners relevant for the first time in their franchise history hitters dingers and dongers in his prime. The Mariners have had their own set of stars in Ichiro, A-Rod, and Edgar Martinez, however the franchise has been irrelevant.
 
Re: 122 Franchises Ranked Bottom to Top:

TBF, Ichiro will be in the Hall soon and Edgar should be but, yeah the Mariners have been largely irrelevant.
 
Re: 122 Franchises Ranked Bottom to Top:

TBF, Ichiro will be in the Hall soon and Edgar should be but, yeah the Mariners have been largely irrelevant.

They're not second from the bottom of all major sports franchises, ferchrissakes.
 
Re: 122 Franchises Ranked Bottom to Top:

121. Seattle Mariners
Hall of Famer...Ken Griffey Jr., Jr made the Mariners relevant for the first time in their franchise history hitters dingers and dongers in his prime. The Mariners have had their own set of stars in Ichiro, A-Rod, and Edgar Martinez, however the franchise has been irrelevant.

Also had Randy Johnson. Given the 116 win season and the talent they once had, 2nd-from-last seems a bit harsh...unless this one of those "what have you done for me lately?" rankings rather than historical.



On what basis can a franchise that has only played 3 games in its entire history be ranked higher, historically? No fancy formulas here, eh? ;)






If jersey sales are any metric, then the Hartford Whalers get ranked higher than the Carolina Hurricanes......
 
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