Kepler
Si certus es dubita
Re: What the Fark 4: It's not unusual to be strange anymore
So yesterday at my work a stranger came in and asked whether we could show him our surveillance footage of our parking lot. He said his car had been hit and he was trying to ID the hit and run. We told him we'd review the tape and see. So he left.
And we looked.
The footage belongs on Worldstar. The guy (the hitee) can be seen driving his truck in our back lot, and slowing down next to another parked car. He gets out, walks around the car a couple times, and cocks his head like a robin looking at a confusing motion in the trees. And then, and I swear I'm not making this up, he flexes his arms like Ahnie a couple times, and whacks one fist into his other hand like Bluto in a Popeye cartoon. I mean, nobody's around and he's doing stuff that looks like mugging for a camera. "Why I'll moitalize 'im!"
Then he does the rational thing. He parks right behind the other car, trapping it, grabs his stuff, and heads off towards (I assume) the gym behind us.
Fast forward the footage for about 40 minutes. The guy's truck is right in the center of the driving lane by a blind corner, and roid-heads are blasting through the lot to and from the gym and barely missing him. There are probably 15 close calls, but no lucky winner.
Finally, a guy comes out to a car parked perpendicular to Our Hero with maybe 0.8 car's clearance to get around him -- easy with a slight turn and some common sense. He relaxes, and mixes one of those energy drinks on his hood, and looks at the guy's truck. After about five minutes he gets in his own car and starts to edge out one way, but the minor axis is too short, so he pulls back in and obviously he can get out by turning the other way. So he turns his wheel back to straight and then blasts straight back and T-bones the guy's truck -- the impact is so hard the truck rocks sideways. We can't see the damage but he hits right in the center of the driver's side panel so presumably it folded right in. Car guy never gets out, just readjusts and three point turns his a-ss out of there as fast as he can go.
It's like something from candid camera. Is this really a cross-section of what's happening out there every day? I'm not sure how people remember to breath.
Anyway, we couldn't ID the license plate for Our Hero so I guess that's the end of it unless they meet again in the lot, in which case I assume we'll all be giving testimony at the murder trial.
So yesterday at my work a stranger came in and asked whether we could show him our surveillance footage of our parking lot. He said his car had been hit and he was trying to ID the hit and run. We told him we'd review the tape and see. So he left.
And we looked.
The footage belongs on Worldstar. The guy (the hitee) can be seen driving his truck in our back lot, and slowing down next to another parked car. He gets out, walks around the car a couple times, and cocks his head like a robin looking at a confusing motion in the trees. And then, and I swear I'm not making this up, he flexes his arms like Ahnie a couple times, and whacks one fist into his other hand like Bluto in a Popeye cartoon. I mean, nobody's around and he's doing stuff that looks like mugging for a camera. "Why I'll moitalize 'im!"
Then he does the rational thing. He parks right behind the other car, trapping it, grabs his stuff, and heads off towards (I assume) the gym behind us.
Fast forward the footage for about 40 minutes. The guy's truck is right in the center of the driving lane by a blind corner, and roid-heads are blasting through the lot to and from the gym and barely missing him. There are probably 15 close calls, but no lucky winner.
Finally, a guy comes out to a car parked perpendicular to Our Hero with maybe 0.8 car's clearance to get around him -- easy with a slight turn and some common sense. He relaxes, and mixes one of those energy drinks on his hood, and looks at the guy's truck. After about five minutes he gets in his own car and starts to edge out one way, but the minor axis is too short, so he pulls back in and obviously he can get out by turning the other way. So he turns his wheel back to straight and then blasts straight back and T-bones the guy's truck -- the impact is so hard the truck rocks sideways. We can't see the damage but he hits right in the center of the driver's side panel so presumably it folded right in. Car guy never gets out, just readjusts and three point turns his a-ss out of there as fast as he can go.
It's like something from candid camera. Is this really a cross-section of what's happening out there every day? I'm not sure how people remember to breath.
Anyway, we couldn't ID the license plate for Our Hero so I guess that's the end of it unless they meet again in the lot, in which case I assume we'll all be giving testimony at the murder trial.
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