The Rick Perry rebrand is already a smashing success. He is charming, adorable, smart-looking, smart, and awesome. That’s right, awesome. You know who declared Rick Perry “awesome”? Rick Perry himself did! And since Rick Perry is smart now, it must be true.
The Des Moines Register did the Lord’s work of following Perry’s bumbling around the Iowa State Fair earlier this week, where he was being straight up weird:
Perry seemed pumped up after his enthusiastic, heckle-free reception at the Register’s Soapbox. When the Register’s moderator thanked him as he came off the stage, Perry said: “You’re welcome. I’m awesome!”
Perry also reportedly shook a 10-year-old girl’s hand until she had to say to him, “I can’t feel my fingers.” He “circulated among the reporters, sharing his bacon. ‘Don’t be a fool. Take some,’ he said. And then he searched for some napkins. ‘Don’t lick your fingers in public,’ he said to no one in particular.”