gmann
Cheer up, the worst is yet to come
Re: Rep Retirement Lodge #171: On Turkeys.
You crack that code and you will be a very very wealthy man. Believe me. Very very wealthy.
A man was walking along a beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up, rubbed it and out popped a genie.
The genie said "You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah. This is the fourth time this month and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three. You only get one wish!"
The man sat and thought about it for a while and said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii but I'm scared to fly and I get very seasick.
"Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?"
The genie laughed and said, "That's impossible! Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete! How much steel! You're going to have to think of another wish."
The man agreed, and tried to think of a really good wish. Finally, he said, "I've been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I don't care and that I'm insensitive. So, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside and what they're thinking when they give me the silent treatment. I want to figure out why they're crying, know what they really want when they say 'nothing', and know how to make them truly happy."
The genie paused for a while and said, "How many lanes do you want on that bridge?"
Women need to be more straight forward. We're guys, we don't pick up on clues or hints.
Shorthand on a text conversation on Thursday:
Buddy: Want to go to SCSU game Saturday night?
Me: Yeah, sounds good.
Buddy: Okay, just have to run it by the wife first. Shouldn't be a problem.
Me: Okay.
Buddy: We're good. Get the tickets.
Me: Done.
Friday (today)
Me: Where are we going to meet? [Things then get planned.]
Buddy: okay, we'll meet there. FYI, I'm in the doghouse for this.
Me: Why?
Buddy: Long story, we'll discuss tomorrow. Basically, yes doesn't mean yes all the time.
Me: Being married sure sounds fun.
He got permission from his wife through text, so it's not like he could pick up on a nasty look she might have been sending anyway. If yes means no, then just say no from the start otherwise yes loses all meaning. It's a whole word unto itself. We know it. We understand it. Use it.
You crack that code and you will be a very very wealthy man. Believe me. Very very wealthy.
A man was walking along a beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up, rubbed it and out popped a genie.
The genie said "You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah. This is the fourth time this month and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three. You only get one wish!"
The man sat and thought about it for a while and said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii but I'm scared to fly and I get very seasick.
"Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?"
The genie laughed and said, "That's impossible! Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete! How much steel! You're going to have to think of another wish."
The man agreed, and tried to think of a really good wish. Finally, he said, "I've been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I don't care and that I'm insensitive. So, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside and what they're thinking when they give me the silent treatment. I want to figure out why they're crying, know what they really want when they say 'nothing', and know how to make them truly happy."
The genie paused for a while and said, "How many lanes do you want on that bridge?"