Re: Really Terrible Puns Vol 1
This is a good one to tell, rather than read. You have to imagine it more as a dialog, with Dr. Freud in a German accent, with the right inflections and pauses and such, to make it really great. I haven't put it in dialog format here, you can do that in your imagination. A good one to tell in mixed company after a few drinks.
Sigmund Freud had a young schoolteacher as a patient. He could tell right away she was a vibrant, energetic young woman. After a few inquiries, he learned that she was a farmer's daughter who moved to the city. At that time, schoolteachers were expected to live with impeccable decorum, and she was struggling with those expectations. Under Dr. Freud's patient questioning, he learned that her internal conflict was most intense in the spring. He elicited from her memories of animals mating on the farm, of how smelling an evening breeze with certain scents caused her to become short of breath and her heart to beat faster.
She might see a strapping young man and feelings would arise unbidden from some primal area in her limbic system, making it very difficult for her to maintain the strict behavioral standards expected of schoolteachers in that day and age.
He delicately inquired about the "urges" she might be feeling, whether there was any "heat" in her pubic area, and very gently he found a way to ask if she used digital manipulation of her clitoris to bring herself to climax. Blushing, she nodded her assent.
"Aha!" he exclaimed. "That is your problem: you are coming unscrewed."
