Fun with Homonyms....and the like

[ScoobyDoo]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

Meh, this is as good a place to ask the question as any.

For my job, I'm a business systems analyst. I write instructions to application developers on how a system should act when certain events occur. In one of my system rules I wrote, "When the system identifies that the...that does not comport to the layout provided..." Is any of this language above the norm? My developer complained about the word "comport" being present. I've never thought it to be a difficult word. Am I wrong with that thought? Another of my BSA coworkers agrees with the developer. I think they're off their rockers and need to pick up a book some time that's not about glittering vampires and the like.

Why don't they just google the word and learn something? I do it all the time. Sounds to me like they're being lazy.

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

Meh, this is as good a place to ask the question as any.

For my job, I'm a business systems analyst. I write instructions to application developers on how a system should act when certain events occur. In one of my system rules I wrote, "When the system identifies that the...that does not comport to the layout provided..." Is any of this language above the norm? My developer complained about the word "comport" being present. I've never thought it to be a difficult word. Am I wrong with that thought? Another of my BSA coworkers agrees with the developer. I think they're off their rockers and need to pick up a book some time that's not about glittering vampires and the like.

Perhaps they merely found the sentence structure awkward? Merely mean to suggest that a more direct subject / verb / object sentence structure might help clarify meaning (unless of course you are only writing for fellow specialists and not generalists, so that you can totally disregard this suggestion entirely!). I serve as intermediary between lawyers' / accountants' language and concise explanations for well-educated laypeople all the time and it is not always easy to translate technical commentary into "how does this affect me in my daily life" language).

 

[St. Clown]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

Perhaps they merely found the sentence structure awkward? Merely mean to suggest that a more direct subject / verb / object sentence structure might help clarify meaning (unless of course you are only writing for fellow specialists and not generalists, so that you can totally disregard this suggestion entirely!). I serve as intermediary between lawyers' / accountants' language and concise explanations for well-educated laypeople all the time and it is not always easy to translate technical commentary into "how does this affect me in my daily life" language).

Nah, I don't think that's it. I reread what I had wrote a few different times after people complained about the word, and it was pretty simply written. The ellipses I used here merely removed the objects/phrases that my employer might consider company secrets in developing our application. You could almost Mad Lib the thing to make I wrote here to get the complete sentence. I was told by the developer and another analyst that had I used a simpler word than "comport" that everything would have been clear.

 

[vizoroo]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

What they mean is "should have" and they write "should of" because they have only heard it spoken and don't understand the meaning of what they are now writing. Same with "could of" instead of "could have."

Shouldda, wouldda, couldda eliminates all confusion And the proper use of the English language.

 

[FlagDUDE08]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

I planted a beet root along route 342.

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

OK, so I won't start a new thread about alliteration, I'll just use this one, since I had the foresight to append "and the like"

After Cleaning Woman Clara Clifford Discovered the Clean Copper Clappers Kept in a Closet Were Copped by Claude Cooper, the Kleptomaniac From Cleveland, County Cops Cracked the Case and Concluded the Caper



(credit to James Taranto at Wall St. Journal)

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

I was told that if you want to give driving directions in French,
> to go left you say "á gauche"
> to go right you say "á droite"
> to go straight ahead you say "droit"

"droit" and "droite" sound exactly the same except the first ends in a schwa while the second ends in a hard "t". Can you imagine the confusion if it's a noisy ride?



Something like that almost happened to us, nearly a real-life Abbott & Costello moment:

"I turn left up ahead?"

- Right

"What? I turn right?"

- no, you turn left.

"Left?"

- righ....um...correct.

 

[joecct]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

Nair - from bear arms to bare arms all in one sitting.

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

so, did the inventor of the Segway really mean to riff on segue?

Wikipedia implies "yes", but I'm not sure how trustworthy it is....

I thought the answer was "yes" because at the time it was introduced it was touted as a huge revolution in transportation (obviously it could never work in Manhattan, what a mess that would be, I get shoved around enough by the pedestrians as it is ), others thought I was just making it up (which I have done once in a while... )

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

I always knew he was way out there, but...

Rover lands on Mars?

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

Not sure if this one had come up before, we noticed it last night when discussing a brain teaser.

The brain teaser: which weighs more, an ounce of gold or an ounce of feathers?

the answer is not "they are the same" since they are measured in different units! The answer is here: one is measured as a troy ounce, while the other is measured as an avoirdupois ounce.

Then we were talking about carats / carets / carrots

 

[LynahFan]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

I feel like I've seen this one before, but I don't want to Google it at work. In any case, at the Best Buy near my house yesterday, the electronic signature pad had a sign on it that said, "Use Finger, Pen is Broken."

It's a little funnier if you squish a couple of the words together...

 

[FlagDUDE08]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

During the reality show, the group decided to pare the pair of annoying contestants who were always eating a pear.

 

[LynahFan]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

Oh yeah? Well, during the tradesmen's organization procedural committee meeting, the wrights decided to write the right rites to avoid any confusion.

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

Oh yeah? Well, during the tradesmen's organization procedural committee meeting, the wrights decided to write the right rites to avoid any confusion.

Do you think there is a Miranda Wright anywhere in this great country of ours?

I do know that there is a Dorothy Comm....

(what is the common nickname for Dorothy? )

 

[SteveP]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

OK, so I won't start a new thread about alliteration, I'll just use this one, since I had the foresight to append "and the like"

After Cleaning Woman Clara Clifford Discovered the Clean Copper Clappers Kept in a Closet Were Copped by Claude Cooper, the Kleptomaniac From Cleveland, County Cops Cracked the Case and Concluded the Caper

(credit to James Taranto at Wall St. Journal)

I'm a big Taranto fan, but you just can't beat the original.

<embed flashVars="playerVars=autoPlay=no" src="http://www.metacafe.com/fplayer/42943/johnny_carson_copper_clappers.swf" width="440" height="248" wmode="transparent" allowFullScreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" name="Metacafe_42943" pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/go/getflashplayer" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"></embed><div style="font-size:12px;"><a href="http://www.metacafe.com/watch/42943/johnny_carson_copper_clappers/">Johnny Carson - Copper Clappers</a> - <a href="http://www.metacafe.com/">For more funny videos, click here</a></div>

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

Anyone ever heard a four-syllable homonym?

I know we have parody - parity or principal - principle for three.....


Note: monogomous - monotonous does not count here!

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

Anyone ever heard a four-syllable homonym?

duh, as they say, a real basic one.

Stationary

Staitionery

 

[FreshFish]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

While technically it is not a "homonym" since it is exactly the same word, it is ironic that the same word has opposite definitions, depending upon context.

In politics, something "polarizing" means that the two extremes are enhanced; more people are at one end or the other.

In optics, something "polarizing" means that rigid conformity is imposed: all the light waves vibrate in the same plane.

"Polarization" in politics is often associated with a failure to get anything accomplished (which, given the solutions many politicians often arrive at, may sometimes be better than the alternative!).

"Polarization" in optics is often associated with improved visibility. Anyone with polarizing sunglasses will know what I mean. I often wear mine on cloudy days, and can see better. Weird as it is, you can often improve your vision while driving at night in foggy weather by wearing polarizing sunglasses too! (it cuts down on the back-scatter from the headlights)


and here is a real amazing thing, in several steps:
> If you have one set of polarizing filters oriented to the vertical, and a second set oriented to the horizontal, and you shine the same beam of light through them both, no light gets through.
> if you have a third set of polarizing filters oriented 45[SUP]o[/SUP] to the other two, if you place it in front of both or behind both, no light gets through.
> however, if you place this third set of filters in between the other two, some light does get through.
> it defies our expected sense of logic, yet it happens.
> a lesson there somewhere??

 

[Carter]

Re: Fun with Homonyms....and the like

I feel like I've seen this one before, but I don't want to Google it at work. In any case, at the Best Buy near my house yesterday, the electronic signature pad had a sign on it that said, "Use Finger, Pen is Broken."

It's a little funnier if you squish a couple of the words together...

Wisconsin is known for giving it's Governor one of the most powerful veto powers on earth. Many years ago when Tommy Thompson was still governor, the headline on the paper was "Thompson's Pen is Mightier Than Sword". And there actually was a smaller space between pen and is. The whole state was laughing.