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Dump Term 2 Part 5: He Didn't Specify Which Civilization Would Die...

What is the original source of this meme?
If you mean the actors, that's Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman from Attack of the Clones. It's Star Wars, so you've probably never seen it ;)

If you mean who made the meme, it was me, based on several quotes from GOP politicians.
 
I mean the source. I've never seen it* and if that's any indication, I'm glad. How can a movie be so bad that even Natalie Portman sucks?

* I've seen:

4 -- A+
5 -- A
6 -- C
1 -- F
8 -- D-

Are any of 2, 3, 7, or 9 not shit? I have heard that by my standards 3 is maybe a C/C- but the rest don't bother.
 
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If that's original, have a cheroot.

I had never heard of Ian McDiarmid but in the Beforetimes he must have been a real actor. Royal Shakespeare Company aint playin'.


Macbeth Act II, Scene 3

Knocking within. Enter a Porter.

PORTER Here’s a knocking indeed! If a man were
porter of hell gate, he should have old turning the
key. (Knock.) Knock, knock, knock! Who’s there, i’
th’ name of Beelzebub? Here’s a farmer that hanged
himself on th’ expectation of plenty. Come in time!
Have napkins enough about you; here you’ll sweat
for ’t. (Knock.) Knock, knock! Who’s there, in th’
other devil’s name? Faith, here’s an equivocator
that could swear in both the scales against either
scale, who committed treason enough for God’s
sake yet could not equivocate to heaven. O, come in,
equivocator. (Knock.) Knock, knock, knock! Who’s
there? Faith, here’s an English tailor come hither for
stealing out of a French hose.* Come in, tailor. Here
you may roast your goose. (Knock.) Knock, knock!
Never at quiet.—What are you?—But this place is
too cold for hell. I’ll devil-porter it no further. I had
thought to have let in some of all professions that go
the primrose way to th’ everlasting bonfire. (Knock.)
Anon, anon!

The Porter opens the door to Macduff and Lennox.

I pray you, remember the porter.

MACDUFF
Was it so late, friend, ere you went to bed
That you do lie so late?

PORTER Faith, sir, we were carousing till the second
cock, and drink, sir, is a great provoker of three
things.

MACDUFF What three things does drink especially
provoke?

PORTER Marry, sir, nose-painting, sleep, and urine.
Lechery, sir, it provokes and unprovokes. It provokes
the desire, but it takes away the performance.
Therefore much drink may be said to be an
equivocator with lechery. It makes him, and it
mars him; it sets him on, and it takes him off; it
persuades him and disheartens him; makes him
stand to and not stand to; in conclusion, equivocates
him in a sleep and, giving him the lie, leaves
him.

MACDUFF I believe drink gave thee the lie last night.

PORTER That it did, sir, i’ th’ very throat on me; but I
requited him for his lie, and, I think, being too
strong for him, though he took up my legs sometime,
yet I made a shift to cast him.

MACDUFF Is thy master stirring?

Enter Macbeth.

Our knocking has awaked him. Here he comes.

Porter exits.


*
I never understood this one before. Attendez vous:

The English tailor is a perennial, albeit less topical figure of mockery in the period. Tailors were assumed to be thieves, trusted with expensive cloth which they then skimped on, stealing the offcuts, or surreptitiously doubling over fabric when cutting out so that they cut twice as much and stole even more.

French hose here are probably baggy, meaning that there would be potentially more to steal.

Another part of the joke is that English men were thought to have no native fashions, but rather to steal from every other nation, hence the English tailor making breeches in the fashionable French style.

A tailor’s hell was the basket or other container under the table on which he sat cross-legged to sew, into which he threw offcuts and scraps, stolen or not, for reuse.

The goose that he will roast is a small pressing iron, the sort that might be used for pressing flat a seam or a facing.

But a goose is also a prostitute (and the lymphatic swelling associated with syphilis), the tailor the tail for female genitalia, and the hose the male.

And that, boys and girls, is why Bill's a genius while the rest of us are kumquats. Six nested puns, allusions, and dirty jokes all in one tiny line which hitherto I barely even heard let alone comprehended.

Anyone who tells you humans are not worthy of saving, just remember Bill. He may be the only reason to save us, but he was in the universe, and we are he. We contain promise.
 
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I mean the source. I've never seen it* and if that's any indication, I'm glad. How can a movie be so bad that even Natalie Portman sucks?
Because they were acting against a green screen and had abysmal directing. George Lucas is a visionary storyteller and dragged Hollywood kicking and screaming into the digital era; screen writing and directing? Notsomuch.

As a Star Wars nerd ™️ I would rank them
5, 4, R1, 6, 3, 7, 8, HS, 1, 2, 9

You might like 3. You might like 8 (Last Jedi) because it is so different from the others. Rogue One is another. I wouldn't recommend the others. 7 is good but only because of nostalgia, which wouldn't be a factor for you.

You would LOVE the show Andor though. Political intrigue to the max and timeless themes that seem straight from the headlines. I mean, the GOP/MAGA complains that the Empire is fashioned after W or Trump which is especially hilarious because Lucas has said the model for the Empire was Fascist movements in Italy and Germany, so...
 
George Lucas is a visionary storyteller

Joseph Campbell is a visionary storyteller. George Lucas is a clever student of film who also made 4 good movies: one really fun student film, the best film about the Sixties ever made (his best movie by far), one fun Space Opera whose inspiration was stolen borrowed from the 30s, and one fun adventure film whose inspiration was stolen borrowed from the 40s.

George Lucas is Quentin Tarantino with none of the sense of humor about himself.

This is not trashing Lucas. Making 4 good movies is outstanding. Maybe 25 directors have done that in history.
 
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You would LOVE the show Andor though. Political intrigue to the max and timeless themes that seem straight from the headlines. I mean, the GOP/MAGA complains that the Empire is fashioned after W or Trump which is especially hilarious because Lucas has said the model for the Empire was Fascist movements in Italy and Germany, so...

Thank you. I avoided Andor because of what they did to Mandolarian, which started so well and became such fetid tripe.

I will give it a shot, though.

Anarcho-syndacalists talk about Andor, which... OK, admittedly I didn't expect that.
 
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Just don't watch anything because all you'll do is whine about it.

Not true. There are probably 100 movies made every year that I either love or would love if I only knew them.

I just hate crap, and we live in Sturgeon's Universe.

Think of how great popular TV is now compared to the 50s-70s. It's just popular movies of the 30s-50s were that great compared to movies now. Art goes in cycles. Painting's sucked for a century. It will get better. In the meantime, hold the line and call shit shit.
 
Joseph Campbell is a visionary storyteller. George Lucas is a clever student of film who also made 4 good movies: one really fun student film, the best film about the Sixties ever made (his best movie by far), one fun Space Opera whose inspiration was stolen borrowed from the 30s, and one fun adventure film whose inspiration was stolen borrowed from the 40s.

George Lucas is Quentin Tarantino with none of the sense of humor about himself.

This is not trashing Lucas. Making 4 good movies is outstanding. Maybe 25 directors have done that in history.
TBF, almost everything is stolen from somewhere. There are only a few truly original ideas for stories. And Lucas himself has been very blunt about the inspiration for Star Wars being that he wanted to make a Flash Gordon film but couldn't get the rights.
 
TBF, almost everything is stolen from somewhere.

Of course. Every story goes back to Homer, the Bible, the Vedas, or Gilgamesch, and the only reason we credit them is we don't have the stories they stole from.

Originality is never "I thought of a new thing." It's "I thought of a new way to say a very old thing that will make your brain release good chemicals." That's all an artist is.

It's not trashing an artist to say they have feet of clay. It just offends the groupies who have only ever read, heard, or watched one thing and have become religious zealots and protect The God.
 
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Thank you. I avoided Andor because of what they did to Mandolarian, which started so well and became such fetid tripe.

I will give it a shot, though.

Anarcho-syndacalists talk about Andor, which... OK, admittedly I didn't expect that.
There are numerous great monologues (you'll love Nemik's manifesto)
This is from S2 E9 and the parallels to today are too obvious to miss (but it was written years ago)
 
There are numerous great monologues (you'll love Nemik's manifesto)
This is from S2 E9 and the parallels to today are too obvious to miss (but it was written years ago)
I gave up in the Star Wars franchise, it just felt like it was getting to be too much, to fast, and there some of it just wasn't interesting to me. I may have to go on over and watch this.

I got talking about movie franchises with my son's barber the other day. Back in the "good ol' days", studios took time to release films. A lot of that had to do with the technology, I know. But now you look at all the franchises, Marvel, Star Wars, Misssion Impossible, even animations like Despicable Me/Minions (I think Toy Story has done a great job on spacing), they seemed to pump releases out as fast as they could as technology evolved, becoming almost bloated. The hype over having to wait a couple of years for the next release was lost. Now, looking at those franchises and having some time to get back into films, I find myself having to Google them to make sure I am getting them in the right order.
 
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