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2014 Bottom-Feeders Bracket, Futile Four BRACKETOLOGY
- Thread starter Freddie
- Start date
Re: 2014 Bottom-Feeders Bracket, Futile Four BRACKETOLOGY
On the event the teams remain "missing", i sugget:
1. Draft locals--Qualified if they can spell Army, USA, or UAH.
(If necessary, hang out at nearest dive at closing time and shanghai enough drunks to come up with 10--2 teams of 5. Goalies are not required)
2. Equipment can be scavenged from what is left of rink. Sticks and stones are fine.
3. Play until 1 goal is scored no matter how long it takes.
On the event the teams remain "missing", i sugget:
1. Draft locals--Qualified if they can spell Army, USA, or UAH.
(If necessary, hang out at nearest dive at closing time and shanghai enough drunks to come up with 10--2 teams of 5. Goalies are not required)
2. Equipment can be scavenged from what is left of rink. Sticks and stones are fine.
3. Play until 1 goal is scored no matter how long it takes.
Re: 2014 Bottom-Feeders Bracket, Futile Four BRACKETOLOGY
Count me as one who does not want to know how this one ends; we need more mysteries a la the Twilight Zone.
Count me as one who does not want to know how this one ends; we need more mysteries a la the Twilight Zone.
MissThundercat
Are the cis okay?
Re: 2014 Bottom-Feeders Bracket, Futile Four BRACKETOLOGY
Or we just call it a draw and have Army and UAH share the Futile Four crown.
Or we just call it a draw and have Army and UAH share the Futile Four crown.
Re: 2014 Bottom-Feeders Bracket, Futile Four BRACKETOLOGY
MYSTERY SOLVED, HUNTSVILLE TAKES TITLE IN EPIC FAILURE
Omaha NE. News has finally reached us that Alabama-Huntsville has been crowned BFB/Futile4 champions, following their third period collapse which resulted in a 3-1 loss to Army early Tuesday morning. All communications with Benson Ice Arena were lost during the second intermission late Monday with the game still scoreless.
Speculation regarding the game outcome and whereabouts of the teams have circulated via various medium for the past 48 hours, including rumors of alien abduction and jihadist attack. As it turns out it was something much simpler and appropriate for BottomFeederBracket/Futile4. The partially demolished rink, lacking electricity needed to power the ice making plant or lights, had provided a perfect BFB environment as the teams scraped their way through two scoreless periods. During the second intermission, however, a gust of wind caused much of the remaining roof to cave in, rendering the building (even by BFB standards) unplayable. The only injuries were minor cuts and bruises to all five members of the Dodge Street Barbershop Quartet.
Game officials, coaches and the park manager held a brief conference in a nearby picnic shelter and decided to wait for daylight and finish the game with roller blades on the tennis courts across the street. BFB management staunchly denies any connection between this event and a reported break-in at Canfield's Sporting Goods where 44 pairs of roller blades and a pack of four racquetballs were stolen.
Just 1:23 into the third period UAH defenseman Wade Schools received a five minute major for checking from behind. "The sun was in my eyes" explained Schools "I never saw him." Army took advantage of the game's first power play, scoring twice during the five minute man-advantage. Army forward Zac Zaremba used the tennis net as a screen to pick off Charger defenseman Graeme Strukoff, essentially creating a five on three while the helpless Chilliwack BC native tried in vain to extricate himself from the net. Three minutes later, the still-shorthanded Chargers suffered another misfortune as forward Regan Soquila got the wheels of his skates caught in a crack in the cement allowing Army's Clint Carlisle a free lane to move through.
Returning to full strength seemed to recharge the Chargers, as they cut the gap to 2-1 on their only power play opportunity of the game. With Army's Jonathon Gehrt serving a minor for the rarely enforced "excessive flatulence" penalty, and goaltender Rob Tadazak watching squirrels chase each other in the trees, Huntsville freshman Joakim Broberg scored his first collegiate goal. Gehrt apologized to teammates and opponents alike "I should have know better than to eat breakfast at White Castle."
An empty net goal, scored after the entire Huntsville team had left the rink brought the final to 3-1. With no game clock visible to the teams, each bench was relying on the time-keeping prowess of their equipment managers, and the UAH team thought the game was over. Coach Mike Corbett was heard to say "I wanted to get my guys out of here before somebody could present us with some piece of **** trophy."
Both teams went directly to their busses, and were gone before the officials even knew the clock had expired. When asked why nobody ever reported the game results, referee Moe Howard said "We assumed nobody cared."
MYSTERY SOLVED, HUNTSVILLE TAKES TITLE IN EPIC FAILURE
Omaha NE. News has finally reached us that Alabama-Huntsville has been crowned BFB/Futile4 champions, following their third period collapse which resulted in a 3-1 loss to Army early Tuesday morning. All communications with Benson Ice Arena were lost during the second intermission late Monday with the game still scoreless.
Speculation regarding the game outcome and whereabouts of the teams have circulated via various medium for the past 48 hours, including rumors of alien abduction and jihadist attack. As it turns out it was something much simpler and appropriate for BottomFeederBracket/Futile4. The partially demolished rink, lacking electricity needed to power the ice making plant or lights, had provided a perfect BFB environment as the teams scraped their way through two scoreless periods. During the second intermission, however, a gust of wind caused much of the remaining roof to cave in, rendering the building (even by BFB standards) unplayable. The only injuries were minor cuts and bruises to all five members of the Dodge Street Barbershop Quartet.
Game officials, coaches and the park manager held a brief conference in a nearby picnic shelter and decided to wait for daylight and finish the game with roller blades on the tennis courts across the street. BFB management staunchly denies any connection between this event and a reported break-in at Canfield's Sporting Goods where 44 pairs of roller blades and a pack of four racquetballs were stolen.
Just 1:23 into the third period UAH defenseman Wade Schools received a five minute major for checking from behind. "The sun was in my eyes" explained Schools "I never saw him." Army took advantage of the game's first power play, scoring twice during the five minute man-advantage. Army forward Zac Zaremba used the tennis net as a screen to pick off Charger defenseman Graeme Strukoff, essentially creating a five on three while the helpless Chilliwack BC native tried in vain to extricate himself from the net. Three minutes later, the still-shorthanded Chargers suffered another misfortune as forward Regan Soquila got the wheels of his skates caught in a crack in the cement allowing Army's Clint Carlisle a free lane to move through.
Returning to full strength seemed to recharge the Chargers, as they cut the gap to 2-1 on their only power play opportunity of the game. With Army's Jonathon Gehrt serving a minor for the rarely enforced "excessive flatulence" penalty, and goaltender Rob Tadazak watching squirrels chase each other in the trees, Huntsville freshman Joakim Broberg scored his first collegiate goal. Gehrt apologized to teammates and opponents alike "I should have know better than to eat breakfast at White Castle."
An empty net goal, scored after the entire Huntsville team had left the rink brought the final to 3-1. With no game clock visible to the teams, each bench was relying on the time-keeping prowess of their equipment managers, and the UAH team thought the game was over. Coach Mike Corbett was heard to say "I wanted to get my guys out of here before somebody could present us with some piece of **** trophy."
Both teams went directly to their busses, and were gone before the officials even knew the clock had expired. When asked why nobody ever reported the game results, referee Moe Howard said "We assumed nobody cared."
It was sent to Tuscaloosa.
Re: 2014 Bottom-Feeders Bracket, Futile Four BRACKETOLOGY
A leading candidate for site of the 2015 BottomFeederBracket/Futile4:
Pontiac Silverdome
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/...ions_n_5234321.html?ncid=txtlnkusaolp00000592
A leading candidate for site of the 2015 BottomFeederBracket/Futile4:
Pontiac Silverdome
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/...ions_n_5234321.html?ncid=txtlnkusaolp00000592
Looks like the timing could not be more perfect.
MissThundercat
Are the cis okay?
Re: 2014 Bottom-Feeders Bracket, Futile Four BRACKETOLOGY
It still has a roof... granted, a cracked and crumbling roof, but a roof nonetheless.
It still has a roof... granted, a cracked and crumbling roof, but a roof nonetheless.
Well, it had a roof until January 2013; that should be bad enough for the Futile Four, no?
BUPhD
Active member
Re: 2014 Bottom-Feeders Bracket, Futile Four BRACKETOLOGY
Calling this a roof is generous. If you can get enough of a sheet under what's left of that, then sure, go for it!
http://photos.mycapture.com/DETN/1370049/39081398E.jpg
[forum software or something is changing my img tags to url tags!]
Calling this a roof is generous. If you can get enough of a sheet under what's left of that, then sure, go for it!
http://photos.mycapture.com/DETN/1370049/39081398E.jpg
[forum software or something is changing my img tags to url tags!]
Patman
Rodent of Unusual Size
It keeps out most of rain and some of birds, I say go for it
FadeToBlack&Gold
Microlot Marxist
Re: 2014 Bottom-Feeders Bracket, Futile Four BRACKETOLOGY
Ha, that eyesore is 20 mins from my house. I remember a few years ago there was talk of renovating it into a combination MLS stadium and ice facility. Mum's the word since, so that likely fell through.
It needs to be torn down, and the land sold to a speculator. The location right off M-59 is prime for redevelopment.
But in the meantime, it would make a solid Futile Four venue.
Ha, that eyesore is 20 mins from my house. I remember a few years ago there was talk of renovating it into a combination MLS stadium and ice facility. Mum's the word since, so that likely fell through.
It needs to be torn down, and the land sold to a speculator. The location right off M-59 is prime for redevelopment.
But in the meantime, it would make a solid Futile Four venue.
