Welcome to the Tech/NMU Smack Talk Hotline.
If you wish to comment on the unfavorable male/female ratio at Tech, the perceived lower quality of the available females, or veiled accusations of homosexuality or other sexual deviances amongst the student body as a result of the preceding, press 1.
If you wish to comment on the promiscuity of the women or the prominence of sexually transmitted diseases at NMU, press 2.
If you wish to comment on the recreational activities of the average Michigan Tech student, including World of Warcraft, Dungeons and Dragons, advanced computing and mathematics, and other activities of a "geek" nature, press 3.
If you wish to comment on the perceived lower quality of education available at NMU, the admissions standards at NMU, or the perceived lower job prospects of the average NMU graduate compared to the average Tech graduate, press 4.
If you wish to comment that Tech women are husky, press 5.
If you wish to comment that NMU is where the N stands for knowledge, press 6.
If you think NMU's band is a bunch of boring, talentless hacks, press 7.
If you think Tech's band is a bunch of loonies in funny pants that sound like crap, and a group of trained monkeys would be able to play instruments better, press 8.