Whatever happened to the corny jokes thread? thread

[owslachief]

Hey did you hear the one about the new telekinetic abacus?

A friend bought one for me and though I'm not crazy about it, it's the thought that counts.

 

[MissThundercat]

Re: Whatever happened to the corny jokes thread? thread

My Human Behavior in the Social Environment professor: "Your final assignment isn't something you can get done in one night!"

All of us in class: "Is that a challenge?"

 

[owslachief]

Re: Whatever happened to the corny jokes thread? thread

My Human Behavior in the Social Environment professor: "Your final assignment isn't something you can get done in one night!"

All of us in class: "Is that a challenge?"

I'll try the Self Improvement path

 

[St. Clown]

Why did the man keep wiping ketchup in his eyes?
he was trying to improve his Heinz Sight.


How do you care for someone injured during a peakaboo accident?
You take them to the I See You.

 

[Kepler]

How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.

Why did the old man fall on the farm?

He couldn't see that well.

I went to a concert that cost just 45 cents.

50 Cent featuring Nickelback.

What kind of person uses the bathroom in Brussels?

Europe pee'in.

 

[FadeToBlack&Gold]

What kind of person uses the bathroom in Brussels?

Europe pee'in.

When you're running to get to the loo, you're Russian.

When you're done, you're Finnish.

 

[jericho]

My neighbor just moved from Portland in the Pacific Northwest.

I’ve gotten an Oregon transplant

 

[Jimjamesak]

I had a girlfriend break up with me because I made too many Linkin Park references, but in the end it doesn’t even matter...

 

[Kepler]

Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn't last as long for fat people.

 

[MissThundercat]

Roommate: My thesaurus is missing. I think someone stole it.

Me: Egads! I am simply crestfallen at the speculation of this larceny!