Re: What the Fark???
/never learned, would like to someday without wrecking someone's transmission doing so
reminds me of how I learned....I had to borrow a pickup truck in college because it was my turn to pick up the food supplies for our food co-operative. I forgot to check ahead of time about the transmission, which of course was manual!
At least I understood the theory....

. It wasn't the transmission that was in danger of being wrecked, however.....as the truck was parked in a tight space.
It was release clutch, turn on motor, engage first gear, let in the clutch, lurch forward, slam into the car ahead of me, stall.
Release clutch, turn on motor, engage reverse, let in the clutch, lurch backward, slam into the car behind me, stall.
Repeat several more times, frantically turning the steering wheel with each lurch / slam / stall.
Finally I got out of the space, drove up to the stop sign at the corner, applied the brakes without releasing the clutch, stall.
From there on, I got the hang of it pretty quickly and was zipping about like a seasoned driver on the way back.
If you pay attention while driving an automatic transmission, you can feel the gears shift as you accelerate, which helps you figure out when to shift. You also can get a sense from engine noise or from the tachometer if you know how to read it. It's really merely a matter of practice.