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Religion Thread: That's Me In the Corner...

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Re: Religion Thread: That's Me In the Corner...

wolverineTrumpet said:
The hubs and I had a very secular wedding. I did wear a dress (which is a rare occurrence for me), but I had a person of honor (my brother...he's been my friend since I was born) and bridesminions. Most of my friends are guys, just 'cause some tradition says wear a dress and have only females on your side and males on the other doesn't mean you have to. Now, if all your best friends and the only people you'd want at your side are women, go for it.

My brother's wedding was similar. I was one of his groom's people along with a couple of his close female friends. We wore dresses that matched the bridesmaids. The bride's brother stood on her side and wore a tux that matched the groomsmen.

Gender roles/expectations are a pet peeve of mine. Just treat everyone as human and don't worry about what body parts they have or don't have.

edit: also at my wedding one of my nieces was the ring bearer. She wanted that role, and why shouldn't she have it? She wore a dress that matched her twin sister, the flower girl.
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Same. tHubs had groomsvengers (a la the Avengers) and I had a Lord and Ladies of Awesome. My brother wore a suit that matched the groomsvengers suits, but he sat with the Ladies of Awesome. I didn't wear white because 1)I was hardly a virgin nor do I behave like a demure bride, 2) I looked like a marshmellow, 3) those dresses were f*ing expensive. My red dress (a bridesmaid's dress at the store) cost about the same as a suit and it was awesome. My pregnant Lady of Awesome carried our rings on a bracelet held near her belly -- that was about as close to a ringbearer as we had. We got married by a JP in khakis and a 10$ dress from Target at our rehearsal and said our vows in front of my SIL (NH has silly rules about 1 day/online ordinations). We didn't have cake because it sucks, but we had an ice cream sundae bar.

Gender/schmender. I have an awesome tailored suit that I intend to wear to formal events from now on since it's WAY more comfortable than most dresses and I don't have to wear a corset or duct tape my boobs to look good in it.

So basically, f* everybody and do what you want and people will react how they're going to react anyway.
 
Re: Religion Thread: That's Me In the Corner...

bostonewe said:
Same. tHubs had groomsvengers (a la the Avengers) and I had a Lord and Ladies of Awesome. My brother wore a suit that matched the groomsvengers suits, but he sat with the Ladies of Awesome. I didn't wear white because 1)I was hardly a virgin nor do I behave like a demure bride, 2) I looked like a marshmellow, 3) those dresses were f*ing expensive. My red dress (a bridesmaid's dress at the store) cost about the same as a suit and it was awesome. My pregnant Lady of Awesome carried our rings on a bracelet held near her belly -- that was about as close to a ringbearer as we had. We got married by a JP in khakis and a 10$ dress from Target at our rehearsal and said our vows in front of my SIL (NH has silly rules about 1 day/online ordinations). We didn't have cake because it sucks, but we had an ice cream sundae bar.

Gender/schmender. I have an awesome tailored suit that I intend to wear to formal events from now on since it's WAY more comfortable than most dresses and I don't have to wear a corset or duct tape my boobs to look good in it.

So basically, f* everybody and do what you want and people will react how they're going to react anyway.
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Well said and well done.
 
Re: Religion Thread: That's Me In the Corner...

ShirtlessBob said:
She just disowned me in a very angry text.
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Bob, she may learn. One thing I've wanted to ask - did this cause you to walk away from your church, or did you walk away before that? That may be a big part of it.

My parents weren't crazy about me quitting Catholicism when I was about 19, but they quickly came around. However, it helps that they are moderates to begin with.
 
Re: Religion Thread: That's Me In the Corner...

FadeToBlack&Gold said:
Bob, she may learn. One thing I've wanted to ask - did this cause you to walk away from your church, or did you walk away before that? That may be a big part of it.

My parents weren't crazy about me quitting Catholicism when I was about 19, but they quickly came around. However, it helps that they are moderates to begin with.
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In 2014, I was in the closet, but still believing. Two things forced me to walk away: my dad ranting and raving how marathon running was a sin and how working on Sunday was a sin. Then I was told that my severe depression was God's will and I just should suck it up and accept it.

Since leaving the church, I have discovered this attitude toward LGBT people:

If I had committed murder in cold blood: "That's nice."

When I came out as Bi/Trans: "You're what? We don't know you any more, you sinner! GET OUT!
 
Re: Religion Thread: That's Me In the Corner...

FadeToBlack&Gold said:
My parents weren't crazy about me quitting Catholicism when I was about 19, but they quickly came around. However, it helps that they are moderates to begin with.
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My parents always said they sent me to CCD and took me to church not to make me a Catholic but so that I could make an informed decision. They weren't thrilled that I was an atheist but they were also intelligent enough believers to realize that going through the motions without belief is no improvement over being a sincere non-believer, so they let it drop without much of a problem. My father, as a convert, always felt that life without God was a diminution, and an emptiness, but he was civil about it and we made our peace far more easily than my older brother who retained spiritual instincts but was vocally anti-Catholic. It is interesting that my parents found it easier to accept me, who left completely, than my brother, who simply moved on to other faiths. I suspect I was easier to dismiss as merely wrongheaded while he was more threatening.

My parents were far more concerned with issues of lifestyle and "sinfulness." For example, none of the kids was permitted to share a bedroom with an unmarried partner when we were at my parents' house, even when we were in our forties. It was very much the "my roof, my rules" attitude. But at the same time my parents were always scrupulously polite with those partners and accepted their kids as family.

Basically, they were smart and that made them tolerant. They weren't moderate -- they were indeed hard core orthodox in their faith and extremely unaccepting of what they felt was "backsliding." But they came at religion as much from the head as the groin, and that made them able to empathize with those who had come to other conclusions. I mean, they knew we were all going to hell, but they weren't insistent on throwing it in our faces. ;)
 
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Re: Religion Thread: That's Me In the Corner...

Kepler said:
Beg pardon? I'm not familiar with that part of the scriptures.
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I'm willing to make the bet that it's one of two things: placing personal glory over God, or some play on false idolatry.
 
Re: Religion Thread: That's Me In the Corner...

St. Clown said:
I'm willing to make the bet that it's one of two things: placing personal glory over God, or some play on false idolatry.
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So I made a big mistake and googled it. The best I can say for the result is it didn't stray to porn.

Evidently there are biblical passages which use running a race as a metaphor. Some of the more, ahem, imaginative pastors have decided that if you run an actual race you are reifying god's metaphorical language and endangering your immortal soul by Missing The Point. Which would be fine except those same pastors tend to be the ones who insist on dogmatic literalist readings of other passages which might themselves have been metaphorical.
 
Kepler said:
So I made a big mistake and googled it. The best I can say for the result is it didn't stray to porn.

Evidently there are biblical passages which use running a race as a metaphor. Some of the more, ahem, imaginative pastors have decided that if you run an actual race you are reifying god's metaphorical language and endangering your immortal soul by Missing The Point. Which would be fine except those same pastors tend to be the ones who insist on dogmatic literalist readings of other passages which might themselves have been metaphorical.
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Probably the most famous is 2 Timothy 4:7: "I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith."

Being a Clarkson grad, we, of course, find great appeal in 2 Timothy 2:15 - "Carefully study to present thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth."
 
St. Clown said:
I'm willing to make the bet that it's one of two things: placing personal glory over God, or some play on false idolatry.
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Wasn't even that. Dad was particularly angry that he was going to miss wine and cracker time at church since he usually comes and supports.
 
Re: Religion Thread: That's Me In the Corner...

ShirtlessBob said:
Wasn't even that. Dad was particularly angry that he was going to miss wine and cracker time at church since he usually comes and supports.
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So, he was concerned with the true saving graces of his faith.
 
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