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Fortune Cookie Wise Words ...in bed

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What are some good fortune cookie fortunes you have received?

Today:
Let the world be filled with tranquility and goodwill... in bed.
 
Re: Fortune Cookie Wise Words ...in bed

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Re: Fortune Cookie Wise Words ...in bed

Yesterday: You are capable of hard and dedicated work....in bed.
 
Re: Fortune Cookie Wise Words ...in bed

"Behind every great man are three other men."

Fortune cookies rarely have actual fortunes anymore. That irks me.
 
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Re: Fortune Cookie Wise Words ...in bed

Kepler said:
"Behind every great man are three other men."

Fortune cookies rarely have actual fortunes anymore. That irks me.
Click to expand...
I'm not greedy - I'd even settle for a nice payout instead of an actual fortune.
 
Re: Fortune Cookie Wise Words ...in bed

LynahFan said:
I'm not greedy - I'd even settle for a nice payout instead of an actual fortune.
Click to expand...
They do often have lottery numbers on the back. Or "learn Chinese" lessons.

On the day I dropped my daughter off for college the first time I got a fortune that said "You will relieved of a great burden," and the learn Chinese on the back was for the word "children."
 
Re: Fortune Cookie Wise Words ...in bed

Kepler said:
They do often have lottery numbers on the back. Or "learn Chinese" lessons.

On the day I dropped my daughter off for college the first time I got a fortune that said "You will relieved of a great burden," and the learn Chinese on the back was for the word "children."
Click to expand...

And how many other fortune cookies did you eat that day? ;)
 
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"Courtesy costs nothing."

In bed.
 
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"On Friday your creative side will shine forth with exceptional ideas"...in bed.

"You deserve respect and will eventually get it"...in bed
 
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"Never move to Cleveland."

Not sure if the "...in bed" part makes it funny or just disturbing.

That has to be one of the weirdest fortunes I've ever had.
 
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"A secret admirer will soon reveal himself to you" ... in bed

"You are bundle of energy, it keep you going" ... in bed
 
Re: Fortune Cookie Wise Words ...in bed

aparch said:
"Never move to Cleveland."

Not sure if the "...in bed" part makes it funny or just disturbing.

That has to be one of the weirdest fortunes I've ever had.
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I only know one sexual term that includes the word "Cleveland" and you definitely do not want to go there...
 
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No kidding here. I once really did get a fortune cookie fortune that said "In the dark, all women are beautiful."

I think the "...in bed" part definitely was implied in that one!
 
Re: Fortune Cookie Wise Words ...in bed

Today's fortune cookie was SO fitting...

"You always have the right answers; they just sometimes ask the wrong questions."
 
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