YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

[Gurtholfin]

Didn't see a thread for this...

The thread title is a bit of a joke as we've all seen/had great coaches, but there are awful ones too.

Who's a coach? Who's a good coach?

Funny stories about coaches that you had or that your kids have had.

Good and bad.

Your healing (if needed) begins now...

 

[goldy_331]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

My kid is a first year bantam. He is on a C team and has probably one of the top coaching staffs in the state for his C team.

The head coach has been coaching youth hockey and FB for several years, he played D3 FB and high school hockey. He is calm, level headed, prepared, has a positive learing philosophy and has the team balanced and engaged.

One assistant played on some very good high school teams, not sure if he played beyond that. He's been coaching for years at several levels and has a couple State Jr. Gold titles to his credit and has coached some high level AAA summer hockey. He has a drill for any eventuality. Also very level headed and calm. His older son is 9th grader playing varsity hockey.

Another coach was all-State and played 4 years of DI hockey at Michigan, his daughter is playing DI hockey and his older son is on the local high school varsity. He is very detail oriented, my son loves the detailed instruction he provides in practice. None of the 14 year olds can keep up with him in the Herbies still.

Fourth coach played high school hockey and has coached for years. He is on the Hobey Baker committee too.

No screamers in the bunch but not softies either, the kids have skated a lot of extra laps when they screwed around.

Kids are having fun and learning a ton right now. I expect this to be the top C team in the State by season's end (they are undefeated in District play but have lost a couple close games in a tourney).

In 5 seasons of traveling hockey he has had 2 seasons of poor to mediocre coaches and three of excellent coaches.

 

[Dude Love]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

Just don't rape anyone. Seems to be a hot button these days!

 

[Gurtholfin]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

My biggest coaching gaffe...

I'm not a yeller and I usually (99%) take the approach that when the refs make a call, you just kill it. No arguing or whatever. Always been good at this and expect it from the other coaches that I work with. It just doesn't do any good to argue. The only time I'll get on the refs is if they are letting too much cheap stuff go and someone could get hurt.

A couple of years ago in our pee wee play-downs (tournament to qualify for state) we were the top seed in our region and were playing a team that we had beaten the week before 8-1. We were down 2-0 within the first 3 minutes and had battled back to a 2-3 deficit with a couple minutes to go in the first period.

I was on the offensive doors and making a change, and like it often does, the puck came to the door just as one of my forwards was about to step out. I grabbed him and stopped him and he never even put a toe on the ice. We were immediately called for too many men and I was incredulous as I knew that he didn't go on.

I assumed that the ref had made a mistake and asked him to come over and talk about it, which he refused. He just kept asking me who was going to serve it. We went back and forth "Come here!" & "Who's going to serve it?" Then he slaps me with a "Refusal to participate" 2-minute bench minor.

So now, in an elimination playoff game where we are contender for a State title and top seed, playing a team that we should crush, we are down a goal AND down 2 men. I couldn't believe it and realized right then and there that I may have cost us everything.

Luckily, my son bailed me out with a shorty on the ensuing penalty kill and the period ended 3-3. We went on to win the game 6-5 in double overtime on a goal by, you guessed it, my son. What was amazing and special to me was that my kid bailed me out of my huge mistake.

In the end, turns out that the defensive coach had released a player too soon and that we did in fact have too many men as there were 3 defensemen on the ice. I had asked the bench if anyone else had gone out and they told me no.

Anyway, it could have been huge as we went on to win State a month later, the first for all of us, and I could have ****ed it away.

 

[MavHockey14]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

At first I was offended by the title...

This is my first year coaching, squirt b head coach, and I'm having a blast. Frustrating at times as kids don't focus nearly enough.

 

[goldy_331]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

This is my first year coaching, squirt b head coach, and I'm having a blast. Frustrating at times as kids don't focus nearly enough.

Jeebus, squirts are like 9-10. Kids 9-10 don't focus on ANYTHING. Well, maybe a video game, but nothing else!

Gurt, I would put a lot of that incident on the ref. I have no patience for refs who refuse to give a brief explanation of their calls to coach or captain. I never reffed hockey but reffed IM and Club sports in college and always thought that was a huge part of my job. Don't argue about it, but give an explanation of what you just called.

 

[john g]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

...My biggest coaching gaffe...I assumed that the ref had made a mistake...In the end, turns out that the defensive coach had released a player too soon and that we did in fact have too many men as there were 3 defensemen on the ice. I had asked the bench if anyone else had gone out and they told me no.

1) I hope you privately reamed out the other coach for not coming clean - seems like HE is the one who almost cost you.

2) I hope you publicly apologized to the referee......

 

[Gurtholfin]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

1) I hope you privately reamed out the other coach for not coming clean - seems like HE is the one who almost cost you.

2) I hope you publicly apologized to the referee......

Did both. Told the ref between periods that I wasn't trying to show him up, blah, blah, blah. Was still ticked at him for making that call at that time in that game, but I didn't show it as there were still two periods to go and I hadn't heard from our defensive coach yet about his role.

I'm not there to give the refs a hard time. Some are good, some are bad and when you get to small towns far from civilized society, some are home-town refs. Whatever, they're part of the environment like the ice, the temp or the lighting. You deal with it.

It was still a very bad feeling in the moment when you realize that your team's potential and destiny (for the first time, this group of kids was actually a good team and a true contender) may be slipping away and that you may have been the pivotal catalyst for it. Especially when you do something that is out of character for yourself and that you work hard NOT to do. Of all the times to have an altercation with a ref...

 

[NorthernLite]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

This is my first year coaching, squirt b head coach, and I'm having a blast. Frustrating at times as kids don't focus nearly enough.

The parents will more than compensate for the focus their little warriers lack.
Good for you for getting involved.............and that goes double if you don't have a kid on the team.

 

[goldy_331]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

The parents will more than compensate for the focus their little warriers lack.
Good for you for getting involved.............and that goes double if you don't have a kid on the team.

At 19, let's hope he doesn't have a squirt yet!

He would have been a squirt himself at the time....

 

[ExileOnDaytonStreet]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

Do you need any formal certification to coach (USA Hockey, etc)? What all goes into that?

 

[goldy_331]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

Do you need any formal certification to coach (USA Hockey, etc)? What all goes into that?

Yes, for any USA Hockey affiliated organization. It's complicated (more so this year). You need to take a coaching certification clinic then go through on-line modules for each age-group you want to coach. The modules can take 8 hours to sit through and complete the test. Go to USA Hockey for more info.

 

[Flashy Man]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

First year of head coaching a Peewee B2 team for Duluth East has been a blast so far. Probably one of the youngest head coaches at that level, so it throws other teams and refs a bit off.

 

[Larch]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

Gurt, I would put a lot of that incident on the ref. I have no patience for refs who refuse to give a brief explanation of their calls to coach or captain. I never reffed hockey but reffed IM and Club sports in college and always thought that was a huge part of my job. Don't argue about it, but give an explanation of what you just called.

Goldy - I know we could go round and round on this, so this is all I will say about it. Many refs do or have tried to explain situations, but we get put into a lot of situations where we are getting screamed at or otherwise. Many times it puts us into bad situations, so we choose not to. I obviously have no way of knowing how animated Gurt was or if his voice was elevated, but there are many times where the ref has to be cognizant of the situation and understand that things might escalate if they go over there and it may be better if he doesn't, as much for the ref as the coach. As with all humans we respond to what is being thrown at us, elevated voice (or previous issues), you won't get much, kill us with kindness and we'll explain the situation all day.

I'm not aiming this at anybody in particular, but there is a common misconception that coaches have a right to "talk' to the ref, but there is nothing in any book that says the ref has to explain anything to the coach or really even the captain at the lower levels. In Gurt's situation (or any coach) he has to understand that he probably isn't going to win the argument (good or bad, very few coaches do), calm down and ask at the next whistle or period break. Personally, I put the incident on both at 50-50. Gurt sounds like a pretty good coach and most refs are going to figure that out and give him the benefit of the doubt sooner or later.

That said, kudos to anybody who coaches, I've done it myself and while it can be very rewarding and fun, it can chew you up and spit you out with the best. I've seen a lot of good coaches go by the wayside and always admire the ones that stick with it, even if I don't necessarily enjoy reffing their games.

 

[Timothy A]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

Goldy - I know we could go round and round on this, so this is all I will say about it. Many refs do or have tried to explain situations, but we get put into a lot of situations where we are getting screamed at or otherwise. Many times it puts us into bad situations, so we choose not to. I obviously have no way of knowing how animated Gurt was or if his voice was elevated, but there are many times where the ref has to be cognizant of the situation and understand that things might escalate if they go over there and it may be better if he doesn't, as much for the ref as the coach. As with all humans we respond to what is being thrown at us, elevated voice (or previous issues), you won't get much, kill us with kindness and we'll explain the situation all day.

I'm not aiming this at anybody in particular, but there is a common misconception that coaches have a right to "talk' to the ref, but there is nothing in any book that says the ref has to explain anything to the coach or really even the captain at the lower levels. In Gurt's situation (or any coach) he has to understand that he probably isn't going to win the argument (good or bad, very few coaches do), calm down and ask at the next whistle or period break. Personally, I put the incident on both at 50-50. Gurt sounds like a pretty good coach and most refs are going to figure that out and give him the benefit of the doubt sooner or later.

That said, kudos to anybody who coaches, I've done it myself and while it can be very rewarding and fun, it can chew you up and spit you out with the best. I've seen a lot of good coaches go by the wayside and always admire the ones that stick with it, even if I don't necessarily enjoy reffing their games.

You sound like a pretty level headed, reasonable person, are you going to apply for a reffing job in the B10?

 

[Greyeagle]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

Do you need any formal certification to coach (USA Hockey, etc)? What all goes into that?

Level 1 is a joke, "this is a puck.....". Ok. maybe not that bad but it's pretty rudementry.
Levels 2 & 3 are a little better and IIRC both take most of a day.

It's a good money-making scheme for USA Hockey.


If you think squirts don't focus wait until you coach bantams.....

 

[goldy_331]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

Level 1 is a joke, "this is a puck.....". Ok. maybe not that bad but it's pretty rudementry.
Levels 2 & 3 are a little better and IIRC both take most of a day.

It's a good money-making scheme for USA Hockey.


If you think squirts don't focus wait until you coach bantams.....

You're behind the times. It all changed with this season. Go to the link I provided, or talk to me at Mariucci tonight.

Larch - my issue is that usually the refs who won't explain what they called, are insecure and don't understand the situation, hence are covering up by being dicks about it. Especially if the coach is not too animated. I was at a spring game recently where a kid was called for interference when the puck was right at the feet of the kid he hit. One of the coaches just kept asking "where was the puck" - the ref threw him out rather than answer the question. I was running the clock and right next to the guy asking the ref about it.

 

[Gurtholfin]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

Goldy - I know we could go round and round on this, so this is all I will say about it. Many refs do or have tried to explain situations, but we get put into a lot of situations where we are getting screamed at or otherwise. Many times it puts us into bad situations, so we choose not to. I obviously have no way of knowing how animated Gurt was or if his voice was elevated, but there are many times where the ref has to be cognizant of the situation and understand that things might escalate if they go over there and it may be better if he doesn't, as much for the ref as the coach. As with all humans we respond to what is being thrown at us, elevated voice (or previous issues), you won't get much, kill us with kindness and we'll explain the situation all day.

I'm not aiming this at anybody in particular, but there is a common misconception that coaches have a right to "talk' to the ref, but there is nothing in any book that says the ref has to explain anything to the coach or really even the captain at the lower levels. In Gurt's situation (or any coach) he has to understand that he probably isn't going to win the argument (good or bad, very few coaches do), calm down and ask at the next whistle or period break. Personally, I put the incident on both at 50-50. Gurt sounds like a pretty good coach and most refs are going to figure that out and give him the benefit of the doubt sooner or later.

That said, kudos to anybody who coaches, I've done it myself and while it can be very rewarding and fun, it can chew you up and spit you out with the best. I've seen a lot of good coaches go by the wayside and always admire the ones that stick with it, even if I don't necessarily enjoy reffing their games.

I've got a couple of friends who ref and are good at it and they have said similar things over the years.

I called it my "biggest coaching gaffe" because I KNOW that I'm not going to win the argument and I had known this and lived by this rule up to that point and have since. I broke code, possibly because I allowed my team's poor start to the game against a team that we should easily handle get to me.

I wasn't animated at all and just kept asking him to come talk. You'll have to take my word for it, or not. What I was though was insubordinate in a way and refusing to do what was asked and what was reasonably expected in a hockey game of a coach.

I should have sent a player over right away and then asked to speak to him. I allowed the magnitude of that particular game supersede my own best practices.

There is a back story on this particular ref that I didn't mention, but let's just say that he is one who really likes to insert himself into a game. He's probably 50 or so and has a reputation amongst coaches of being as asspain and really ticky-tack in his calls.

What came out of this though is that I learned a valuable lesson and luckily, didn't have to pay a price to learn it as we still won the game and went on to glory. The situation was all my fault and could have been avoided. You can't let someone else annoy you to the point that you do something silly when they have all the power. It wouldn't be much of a moral victory if we had lost the game but I could say that I was right. That's why I shut my mouth from that point on even though I wanted to jump the boards and choke the ****er out.


Thanks for being a ref. I did it for one season for men's league and said never again. It's a tough job and I just try to be one of the coaches who isn't making it any tougher.

 

[Larch]

Re: YOUTH HOCKEY COACHING THREAD - Ruining the Love of Hockey, One Kid At A Time

I should have sent a player over right away and then asked to speak to him. I allowed the magnitude of that particular game supersede my own best practices.

There is a back story on this particular ref that I didn't mention, but let's just say that he is one who really likes to insert himself into a game. He's probably 50 or so and has a reputation amongst coaches of being as asspain and really ticky-tack in his calls.

The first line (at least the first sentence) is exactly how I was thinking that incident might not have become literal. If you sent somebody over then he was still being an asspain, then I'd be right there will you and goldy and blasting that particular ref.

The second line is all too common and gives all refs a bad name. I've reffed in three different states and there has been at least one in every location, even other refs get frustrated with them, but there isn't much we can do and unfortunately are forced to side with them, even if we don't always agree with them.

 

[MavHockey14]

Level 1 is a joke, "this is a puck.....". Ok. maybe not that bad but it's pretty rudementry.
Levels 2 & 3 are a little better and IIRC both take most of a day.

It's a good money-making scheme for USA Hockey.


If you think squirts don't focus wait until you coach bantams.....

In bantam though I can yell much more frequently if they boys aren't giving a good enough effort.

I agree generally with the no need to talk to a coach, and this is my 8th year as a USA Hockey official. If a coach is screaming at me, I feel no need to go and talk **** from him while I give an explanation. If a coach asks nicely, I'm more inclined to explain something.