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  • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

    Either a he!! of a story here, or the lead in to a joke

    Or, maybe a Quentin Tarantino movie.
    Last edited by SJHovey; 07-12-2019, 09:56 AM.
    That community is already in the process of dissolution where each man begins to eye his neighbor as a possible enemy, where non-conformity with the accepted creed, political as well as religious, is a mark of disaffection; where denunciation, without specification or backing, takes the place of evidence; where orthodoxy chokes freedom of dissent; where faith in the eventual supremacy of reason has become so timid that we dare not enter our convictions in the open lists, to win or lose.

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    • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

      "Oh. You don't want to look in there."
      Last edited by Kepler; 07-12-2019, 11:50 AM.
      Cornell University
      National Champion 1967, 1970
      ECAC Champion 1967, 1968, 1969, 1970, 1973, 1980, 1986, 1996, 1997, 2003, 2005, 2010
      Ivy League Champion 1966, 1967, 1968, 1969, 1970, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1977, 1978, 1983, 1984, 1985, 1996, 1997, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2012, 2014, 2018, 2019, 2020

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      • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

        12% of men are stupid.
        Cornell University
        National Champion 1967, 1970
        ECAC Champion 1967, 1968, 1969, 1970, 1973, 1980, 1986, 1996, 1997, 2003, 2005, 2010
        Ivy League Champion 1966, 1967, 1968, 1969, 1970, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1977, 1978, 1983, 1984, 1985, 1996, 1997, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2012, 2014, 2018, 2019, 2020

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        • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

          Originally posted by Kepler View Post
          Didn't Billie Jean King already take care of this?

          They're beyond stupid.
          **NOTE: The misleading post above was brought to you by Reynold's Wrap and American Steeples, makers of Crosses.

          Originally Posted by dropthatpuck-Scooby's a lost cause.
          Originally Posted by First Time, Long Time-Always knew you were nothing but a troll.

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          • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

            Originally posted by Kepler View Post
            I'll be honest, I'm probably going to need a double fault there.
            That community is already in the process of dissolution where each man begins to eye his neighbor as a possible enemy, where non-conformity with the accepted creed, political as well as religious, is a mark of disaffection; where denunciation, without specification or backing, takes the place of evidence; where orthodoxy chokes freedom of dissent; where faith in the eventual supremacy of reason has become so timid that we dare not enter our convictions in the open lists, to win or lose.

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            • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

              Originally posted by SJHovey View Post
              I'll be honest, I'm probably going to need a double fault there.
              That's the only way on earth it happens. A game is 48 points. Ask yourself how many points would you to need win one? My guess would be 10,000. That's my guess for how many Jake deGrom pitches I'd need to get a hit.

              There's not enough luck involved. If the question is "how many 7-iron shots from 100 yards would you need to get closer to the hole than Tiger" my guess is only about 100. (If it's how many 3-woods from 500 yards the answer is: infinite). Luck would save me. But in these almost completely deterministic cases there's just no room.

              My tennis coach was a 20-year old woman who was a star D-III player. I could not return her serves and she was serving at 80%. I asked her if she could ever win a game (not a point) on the pro circuit and her answer was: absolutely not.
              Last edited by Kepler; 07-12-2019, 02:31 PM.
              Cornell University
              National Champion 1967, 1970
              ECAC Champion 1967, 1968, 1969, 1970, 1973, 1980, 1986, 1996, 1997, 2003, 2005, 2010
              Ivy League Champion 1966, 1967, 1968, 1969, 1970, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1977, 1978, 1983, 1984, 1985, 1996, 1997, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2012, 2014, 2018, 2019, 2020

              Comment


              • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

                When they say game, do they mean actual "game" or "match"? "Game", no way in hell; "match", well maybe you pray she double faults, as others have said. Any point I pick up would be in no way related to me doing squat of course.

                Cornell '04, Stanford '06


                KDR

                Rover Frenchy, Classic! Great post.
                iwh30 I wish I could be as smart as you. I really do you are the man
                gregg729 I just saw your sig, you do love having people revel in your "intelligence."
                Ritt18 you are the perfect representation of your alma mater.
                Miss Thundercat That's it, you win.
                TBA#2 I want to kill you and dance in your blood.
                DisplacedCornellian Hahaha. Thread over. Frenchy wins.

                Test to see if I can add this.

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                • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

                  Originally posted by French Rage View Post
                  When they say game, do they mean actual "game" or "match"? "Game", no way in hell; "match", well maybe you pray she double faults, as others have said. Any point I pick up would be in no way related to me doing squat of course.
                  I read "game" as 2 sets (a women's match): 4 x 6 x 2 = 48 points.

                  If game is just a game, 4 points, then it's even more insane.
                  Cornell University
                  National Champion 1967, 1970
                  ECAC Champion 1967, 1968, 1969, 1970, 1973, 1980, 1986, 1996, 1997, 2003, 2005, 2010
                  Ivy League Champion 1966, 1967, 1968, 1969, 1970, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1977, 1978, 1983, 1984, 1985, 1996, 1997, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2012, 2014, 2018, 2019, 2020

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                  • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

                    If I could take games off of David Wheaton...

                    ...yeah I was 16 and he was 14. Now I couldn't pull of 1 point in 1 game against Serena and probably not even at the peak of my game.

                    Comment


                    • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

                      Originally posted by Kepler View Post
                      That's the only way on earth it happens. A game is 48 points. Ask yourself how many points would you to need win one? My guess would be 10,000. That's my guess for how many Jake deGrom pitches I'd need to get a hit.

                      There's not enough luck involved. If the question is "how many 7-iron shots from 100 yards would you need to get closer to the hole than Tiger" my guess is only about 100. (If it's how many 3-woods from 500 yards the answer is: infinite). Luck would save me. But in these almost completely deterministic cases there's just no room.

                      My tennis coach was a 20-year old woman who was a star D-III player. I could not return her serves and she was serving at 80%. I asked her if she could ever win a game (not a point) on the pro circuit and her answer was: absolutely not.
                      Yeah, I wouldn't want to bet anything more than about a buck that I'd even get a racket on one of her serves, and I'd only bet that $1 out of pride.

                      A guy that I work with has a brother who always plays in a noon basketball game in downtown Minneapolis. Back when Jimmy Butler was playing for the T-wolves, Butler showed up to this noon game one day. Everyone was like, "Uh, okaaay?"

                      The guy told me that Butler didn't take a shot during the entire game, yet utterly dominated it. Guys would think they had an open shot and the ball would disappear two feet out of their hands. Guys would be standing under the basket and the ball would miraculously appear in their hands. He said it was the most astounding thing he'd ever been a part of.
                      That community is already in the process of dissolution where each man begins to eye his neighbor as a possible enemy, where non-conformity with the accepted creed, political as well as religious, is a mark of disaffection; where denunciation, without specification or backing, takes the place of evidence; where orthodoxy chokes freedom of dissent; where faith in the eventual supremacy of reason has become so timid that we dare not enter our convictions in the open lists, to win or lose.

                      Comment


                      • Originally posted by Kepler View Post
                        Even a blind squirrel finds a nut once in a blue moon.

                        Comment


                        • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

                          I think most people realize how good professional/world class amateur athletes are, but you really don't know until something like SJ referenced happens to you should you ever get the chance. I played hockey with guys that never even made it past the USHL and they were so much better. Even my best athletic attributes if I had to pick them:

                          1. Curve ball
                          2. 400m sprint
                          3. WR in h.s.
                          4. Return of service

                          Not a chance. My best 40 time was pretty solid (4.47) and I made state on our 4x400 and Sprint Medley relay teams but even the best Div I guys when I was in college would leave me in their dust.

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                          • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

                            For the record, they didn't say game or match. They said a single solitary point in a single game. Which makes it far more easy than a game and infinitely hard because a game is so short.

                            There are maybe a couple hundred men in the US who aren't on the pro circuit who could ever hope to take a point from Serena. I work with a guy here who has won the amateur nationals around a 4 rating and been back several times. I know another coworker who is rated at a 4.5 or 5. They've played tennis and he says she's friggin hard to beat. Both would say they couldn't take a point, I'm confident of this.

                            I played soccer with and against a guy who was invited to try out for three MLS teams. Even him playing at maybe 25% was better than everyone else in the league on offense and defense. He essentially didn't even have to try on defense. He just read people so well they rarely got by him. His shots were so hard I didn't try to catch them, I was mainly focused on extending my life.

                            I also played soccer with David Backes (NHLer, Olympian) back in high school. The guy was a f-cking beast even back then. Our coach ran a drill where it was 1:1, everything goes except picking up the ball with your hands, and cheap **** like gouging eyes or crotch shots. First person to score won and then had to face the next person in line. Essentially it was a way to help us build our physicality and be more aggressive.

                            The first six or seven people tried to just push him off the ball and use force. THey lasted at most something like 15-20 seconds. Eventually it resorted to larger guys on the team literally jumping on his back trying to tackle him to the ground. He would essentially just stand up and carry them on his back and dribble the ball across the goal line. He went through our entire team a couple times.

                            These aren't people, they superhuman.
                            Code:
                            As of 9/21/10:         As of 9/13/10:
                            College Hockey 6       College Football 0
                            BTHC 4                 WCHA FC:  1
                            Originally posted by SanTropez
                            May your paint thinner run dry and the fleas of a thousand camels infest your dead deer.
                            Originally posted by bigblue_dl
                            I don't even know how to classify magic vagina smoke babies..
                            Originally posted by Kepler
                            When the giraffes start building radio telescopes they can join too.
                            He's probably going to be a superstar but that man has more baggage than North West

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                            • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

                              Originally posted by Kepler View Post
                              That's the only way on earth it happens. A game is 48 points. Ask yourself how many points would you to need win one? My guess would be 10,000. That's my guess for how many Jake deGrom pitches I'd need to get a hit.

                              There's not enough luck involved. If the question is "how many 7-iron shots from 100 yards would you need to get closer to the hole than Tiger" my guess is only about 100. (If it's how many 3-woods from 500 yards the answer is: infinite). Luck would save me. But in these almost completely deterministic cases there's just no room.

                              My tennis coach was a 20-year old woman who was a star D-III player. I could not return her serves and she was serving at 80%. I asked her if she could ever win a game (not a point) on the pro circuit and her answer was: absolutely not.
                              10,000 seems reasonable. Though, the more I think about, the more I think I might put the deGrom number much higher. Getting a hit, not just putting the ball in play, is no easy task. I think 10,000 seems about right for me for ball in play.

                              The rest of the numbers are dead on as well.
                              Code:
                              As of 9/21/10:         As of 9/13/10:
                              College Hockey 6       College Football 0
                              BTHC 4                 WCHA FC:  1
                              Originally posted by SanTropez
                              May your paint thinner run dry and the fleas of a thousand camels infest your dead deer.
                              Originally posted by bigblue_dl
                              I don't even know how to classify magic vagina smoke babies..
                              Originally posted by Kepler
                              When the giraffes start building radio telescopes they can join too.
                              He's probably going to be a superstar but that man has more baggage than North West

                              Comment


                              • Re: What The Fark 5: I Can't Believe This Happened!

                                Originally posted by dxmnkd316 View Post
                                These aren't people, they superhuman.
                                That's the key. It is an amazing experience to meet somebody who is in the top 1/100th of 1% at something; anything. When I was (briefly) in the math department in college I had the privilege of watching a couple award winning mathematicians go at it tooth and nail during office hours in the hemi-demi-semi sub-discipline of their subject in which they were probably 1 and 2 in the world. I understood just enough to understand I was watching Michelangelo fight Rafael to the death (they were screaming at each other). It's not that they skipped steps, they skipped whole papers, maybe whole careers.

                                Only thing like it I've seen was watching professors at Berklee School of Music critique their students' final symphonic compositions by reading the sheet music and hearing everything in their heads. I've never seen chess players play an empty board but that's what it felt like.

                                There is no way any man not on the tour or right on the cusp is getting a point from Serena without it being 100% her fault or a Randy Johnson seagull. None.
                                Last edited by Kepler; 07-12-2019, 03:59 PM.
                                Cornell University
                                National Champion 1967, 1970
                                ECAC Champion 1967, 1968, 1969, 1970, 1973, 1980, 1986, 1996, 1997, 2003, 2005, 2010
                                Ivy League Champion 1966, 1967, 1968, 1969, 1970, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1977, 1978, 1983, 1984, 1985, 1996, 1997, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2012, 2014, 2018, 2019, 2020

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