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  1. Kepler

    Leopards Ate My Face! The Official Thread.

    I doubt it. The giantism toddler looks like a test tuber to me. Melania's been banging her way into society but she knows Dump is poison in NYC.
  2. Kepler

    Leopards Ate My Face! The Official Thread.

    I never expected the grifter to grift me! There's never a bonesaw around when you need one.
  3. Kepler

    Iran So Far Away: 2026

    The shootin' range The convention center when the gun show's in town The parking lot at every job I had between 2004 and 2025
  4. Kepler

    NHL 2026: The Olympics Will Be Mammoth!

    Habs are a game away from advancing. Good.
  5. Kepler

    Dump Term 2 Part 5: He Didn't Specify Which Civilization Would Die...

    I will be disappointed if it wasn't named Outward Bond.
  6. Kepler

    Dump Term 2 Part 5: He Didn't Specify Which Civilization Would Die...

    Did they release bunny rabbits and make them hunt for food, like SERE training?
  7. Kepler

    The 2024 GQP Thread: Because Deutsche Gopher Fan ENDED the Last One

    Everything Republicans do eventually results in pedophilia. If we just gave them underage sex dolls they'd jerk themselves to death. Everybody wins.
  8. Kepler

    Business, Economics, and Taxes 2: That's Why We Fight to Take the Means Back

    Dump accomplished nothing. The only "progess" was he undid some of the damage from his dopey intemperate tub-thumping and tariffs. In brief: he TACOed.
  9. Kepler

    USCHO Music: From Queen to The Beatles to Lady Gaga

    It's not age. It's not education. It's that sniffly posturing that makes 97% of Ivy liberal artsies want to give that 3% of our fellow alumni a razorblade-tipped enema. The problem is the Times, the New Yorker, and the Atlantic are composed entirely of that 3%. They're all wealthy /...
  10. Kepler

    The Dead Thread 2024

    Not any more than usual. Republican grievance perpetually hovers on the edge of the 6 o'clock news.
  11. Kepler

    Russian Invasion of Ukraine

    Meanwhile, in daily mass murder.
  12. Kepler

    Dump Term 2 Part 5: He Didn't Specify Which Civilization Would Die...

    Sam Bankman-Fried has some money to bribe with, right? Too bad Bernie Madoff couldnt hang on.
  13. Kepler

    Dump Term 2 Part 5: He Didn't Specify Which Civilization Would Die...

    10 more years.
  14. Kepler

    Dump Term 2 Part 5: He Didn't Specify Which Civilization Would Die...

    Wait. What was Dump doing in Tennessee?
  15. Kepler

    Movies: Poor Things, Barbie and Oppenheimer are stuck in La La Land

    (1) Nobody is permitted to make fun of Fifth Element. (2) Except this team cuz well just enjoy.
  16. Kepler

    The Dead Thread 2024

    That is sad. :-(
  17. Kepler

    USCHO Music: From Queen to The Beatles to Lady Gaga

    Why the New York Times is what it is.
  18. Kepler

    TV 20 - Sorry no fancy title

    Love is Blind: Poland. Everybody's white (Poles are super racist; I'll bet this was a localized requirement). All the people are older and seem... well... not utterly vapid, anyway. They had reasonably mature and valuable conversations, considering they may be about to get married. This has...
  19. Kepler

    Iran So Far Away: 2026

    I was rooting for blacksplotiation, not Tony Randall as Kyle Rittenhouse.
  20. Kepler

    The Countries: Forget it, Burkina Faso, Michigan is still the worst.

    I don't see any incumbent party in a western democracy getting re-elected until we start pendulating tech and finance bros and clawing back the wealth they have hoarded. Ordinary people's lives are going to continue to suck until we finally drive a stake into the Reagan-Thatcher...
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