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Dad jokes and Bad jokes. One in the same

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  • wolverineTrumpet
    replied
    Originally posted by Kepler View Post

    Presumably, since You Are Not The Father.
    Accurate. I'm the parent that had her parasite surgically removed.
    For some reason, people don't like when I refer to the c-section birth of my daughter that way.

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  • SonofSouthie
    replied
    I was going to tell a time-traveling joke, but you guys didn’t like it.

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  • Kepler
    replied
    Originally posted by wolverineTrumpet View Post
    If I tell a "dad joke" is it a faux Pa?
    Presumably, since You Are Not The Father.

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  • wolverineTrumpet
    replied
    If I tell a "dad joke" is it a faux Pa?

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  • Kepler
    replied
    I got a papercut attempting suicide.

    It's a start.

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  • MissThundercat
    replied
    Originally posted by wolverineTrumpet View Post
    I left my job at a shoe disposal plant. It was sole destroying.
    I had to quit my job crushing pop cans. It was soda pressing.

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  • wolverineTrumpet
    replied
    I left my job at a shoe disposal plant. It was sole destroying.

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  • MissThundercat
    replied
    I took up fencing; the neighbors demanded I put it back.

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  • St. Clown
    replied
    Never start a fight with a dinosaur. You’ll get jurasskicked.

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  • St. Clown
    replied
    I want to open up a store that sells only female dogs and gardening equipment. I could call it Bi+ches & Hoes.

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  • burd
    replied
    Me: I'm not saying a word without my lawyer present.

    Cop: You ARE the lawyer.

    Lawyer: So where's my present?

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  • MissThundercat
    replied
    Originally posted by SonofSouthie View Post
    I grew up in Southie on O Street. Had to walk a block to P.
    You can't hear a pterodactyl use the bathroom because the P is silent.

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  • SonofSouthie
    replied
    I grew up in Southie on O Street. Had to walk a block to P.

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  • St. Clown
    replied
    man: “Help! Do we have a doctor here?”
    woman: “I’m a doctor.”
    man: ”What’s your specialty?”
    woman: ”Mathematics.”
    man: ”My friend’s dying!”
    woman: ”Minus one.”

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  • MissThundercat
    replied
    You don't need a parachute to go skydiving.

    You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.

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