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Just what IS "marriage" anyway?

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  • #16
    Originally posted by FreshFish View Post
    fyp.
    The old testament is part of the bible, is it not? Tim quoted genesis. It's all God's word, right?

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    • #17
      Re: Just what IS "marriage" anyway?

      Originally posted by Gurtholfin View Post
      If there was a "Shat-Stirrer of the Year" award, FF would win running away.
      Why, thank you. I already know what I know and I know what I don't know; these help me learn what others think as well.

      Maybe I need to get out more though. Have these conversations in person rather than on a message board.
      "Hope is a good thing; maybe the best of things."

      "Beer is a sign that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -- Benjamin Franklin

      "Being Irish, he had an abiding sense of tragedy, which sustained him through temporary periods of joy." -- W. B. Yeats

      "People generally are most impatient with those flaws in others about which they are most ashamed of in themselves." - folk wisdom

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      • #18
        Re: Just what IS "marriage" anyway?

        Originally posted by FreshFish View Post
        Why, thank you. I already know what I know and I know what I don't know; these help me learn what others think as well.

        Maybe I need to get out more though. Have these conversations in person rather than on a message board.

        So, you're just curious how people feel about this and when it predictably devolves into a right vs. left **** storm you'll be disappointed and shocked?

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        • #19
          Re: Just what IS "marriage" anyway?

          Originally posted by FreshFish View Post
          Please explicate, I'd like to learn.

          Perhaps I misunderstand the models. I thought one was based on subjugating individual autonomy for long-term goals greater than oneself and one's partner, while the other was based primarily on the self and partner being the central focus. If you understand them differently, I'd genuinely like to know how.

          Thanks.
          It's not that I think one is correct and one isn't, or that the models are flawed; I mean both can be right.
          Bugs Bunny - 96
          Gas House Gorillas - 95

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          • #20
            Re: Just what IS "marriage" anyway?

            Originally posted by unofan View Post
            And yet, the bible has no issues with polygamy. Abraham had 3 wives and a number of concubines. David had 22 wives/concubines. Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines.
            Time and the place. If there was a population imbalance then polyamory would be more acceptable. As it is, as long as you don't use the "m" word, you can live in a poly arrangement today.
            CCT '77 & '78
            4 kids
            5 grandsons (BCA 7/09, CJA 5/14, JDL 8/14, JFL 6/16, PJL 7/18)
            1 granddaughter (EML 4/18)

            ”Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both.”
            - Benjamin Franklin

            Banned from the St. Lawrence University Facebook page - March 2016 (But I got better).

            I want to live forever. So far, so good.

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            • #21
              Originally posted by joecct View Post
              Time and the place. If there was a population imbalance then polyamory would be more acceptable. As it is, as long as you don't use the "m" word, you can live in a poly arrangement today.
              One of the best "debates" that occurs in Dr Strangelove, no?
              a legend and an out of work bum look a lot alike, daddy.

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              • #22
                Re: Just what IS "marriage" anyway?

                Originally posted by Gurtholfin View Post
                So, you're just curious how people feel about this and when it predictably devolves into a right vs. left **** storm you'll be disappointed and shocked?
                Good call.
                I believe in life, and I believe in love, but the world in which I live in keeps trying to prove me wrong.

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                • #23
                  Re: Just what IS "marriage" anyway?

                  Originally posted by FreshFish View Post
                  Read several extremely fascinating articles recently on this topic. If this thread gains any traction, I'll post some excerpts.

                  Basically, two different models which are pretty much incompatible.

                  One model posits that "marriage" is primarily a social institution whose main purpose is to promote inter-generational stability: love, sex, children, lifetime commitment to the other partner, all are interconnected to form a social unit called the "family" and it is a vehicle by which we bring children from infancy to self-sufficiency and adulthood so that they can then repeat the process and perpetuate a healthy society.

                  A different model posits that "marriage" is primarily devoted to the pleasure and enjoyment that the partners find in being with each other. The purpose of marriage is to have society recognize that these two people share a special bond between them. Thanks to birth control, you can have plenty of sex without getting married; if you can't find a decent man, you can still have children if you want and raise them on your own. The interconnectedness of the traditional model is all severed; each of the elements that had previously been interconnected now all stand separately, each on its own.
                  Sounds like you're talking bout marriage and not-marriage, not two incompatible forms of marriage. Having sex without getting married/having children without getting married is not a form of marriage.

                  Are you trying to distinguish based upon whether the marriage results in natural born children? Both of your "models" involve two adults sharing a special bond, presumably with a lifetime commitment, love, sex and family. In one they raise children together, in the other...people raise children outside of marriage? I'm not sure I understand the distinction you're trying to make.

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                  • #24
                    Re: Just what IS "marriage" anyway?

                    Marriage is that thing people shove in my face to boast my difficulties with the fair sex.

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                    • #25
                      Originally posted by FlagDUDE08 View Post
                      Marriage is that thing people shove in my face to boast my difficulties with the fair sex.
                      Do you need a banana bread recipe?



                      ... (Not sure if that reference is from before your time here or not)

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                      • #26
                        Re: Just what IS "marriage" anyway?

                        Originally posted by unofan View Post
                        Do you need a banana bread recipe?



                        ... (Not sure if that reference is from before your time here or not)
                        Before my time. And no, I don't. My friend the millionaire has a kickass one.

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                        • #27
                          Re: Just what IS "marriage" anyway?

                          Originally posted by Gurtholfin View Post
                          No doubt. Why don't I have concubines? Why don't we ALL have concubines?
                          Do the concubines get concubines?

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                          • #28
                            Re: Just what IS "marriage" anyway?

                            Originally posted by goldy_331 View Post
                            Do the concubines get concubines?
                            Yeah. They cost about tree fiddy.
                            Michigan Tech Huskies Pep Band: There's No Use Trying To Talk. No Human Sound Can Stand Up To This. Loud Enough To Knock You Down.

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                            • #29
                              Re: Just what IS "marriage" anyway?

                              Originally posted by DisplacedCornellian View Post
                              I'm not sure I understand the distinction you're trying to make.
                              It was a distinction made by other writers that clicked an "aha" kind of lightbulb in my head. I probably just botched up how they presented their ideas, and for that I apologize for the confusion.

                              What is the societal purpose of marriage?

                              > it serves a social function by establishing a sociological unit called a "family" in which each person's interests are subsumed to the greater good of the whole, for the primary purpose of raising children to a responsible and productive adulthood.

                              or

                              > it serves a social function by asking society to recognize that a special bond exists between two people. The primary focus is on those two people. Children might be involved in some situations, but child-rearing is a secondary function. The self-fulfillment of the spouses is primary.
                              "Hope is a good thing; maybe the best of things."

                              "Beer is a sign that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -- Benjamin Franklin

                              "Being Irish, he had an abiding sense of tragedy, which sustained him through temporary periods of joy." -- W. B. Yeats

                              "People generally are most impatient with those flaws in others about which they are most ashamed of in themselves." - folk wisdom

                              Comment


                              • #30
                                Re: Just what IS "marriage" anyway?

                                Originally posted by unofan View Post
                                do you need a banana bread recipe?



                                ... (not sure if that reference is from before your time here or not)
                                +1. Nice reference.
                                "The party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command." George Orwell, 1984

                                "One does not simply walk into Mordor. Its Black Gates are guarded by more than just Orcs. There is evil there that does not sleep, and the Great Eye is ever watchful. It is a barren wasteland, riddled with fire and ash and dust, the very air you breathe is a poisonous fume." Boromir

                                "Good news! We have a delivery." Professor Farnsworth

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