Really Terrible Puns Vol 1

[huskyfan]

Re: Really Terrible Puns Vol 1

what do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves?

Russell

[FreshFish]

Re: Really Terrible Puns Vol 1

My spouse and I were playing bridge with the Obamas. Every time Barry bid for a contract, we were able to prevent him from taking enough tricks.

Ah, the pleasure that comes with setting a President.....

[FreshFish]

Re: Really Terrible Puns Vol 1

What about a woman with no arms and no legs playing cribbage....Peg?

[joecct]

Re: Really Terrible Puns Vol 1

With the influx of foreign players in MLB, I am waiting for the battery of Wu and Clap. Then the announcer will say, "Pitching Wu and Catching Clap."

[NEWI Badger Fan]

Re: Really Terrible Puns Vol 1

Q: Why does the flourescent light fixture hum?

A: Because it does not know the words.

[gounhwildcats]

Re: Really Terrible Puns Vol 1

John decides he wants to throw a theme party and after some thought he decides it will be an emotion party. So he writes up a bunch of invitations to his friends and sends them out, telling them to come to his house on Saturday night dressed up as their favourite emotion. Saturday night finally arrives and John hears a knock at his door. When he answers it he sees his friend Gary who's dressed from head to toe in green, he even has his face painted green. John thinks for a minute and says "Let me guess Gary, you are green with envy", Gary says "Yes, very good" and John lets him in. After a few more minutes there's another knock at the door and John answers it to see his friend Wanda all dressed up from head to toe in red, even having her face painted red. After a second or two John says "I got it Wanda, you are red with rage." Wanda says "Good work John" and joins the party. A few more minutes pass by and the door knocks again and John answers it and his friend Pete is standing there all dressed in blue. John, getting good at this, takes a crack at it and says "Pete you are blue with sorrow", to which Pete says "Exactly" and heads into to the party. Another few minutes goes by and there's another knock at John's front door. John answers it to find his French Canadian friend Jacques standing there completely naked with a piece of fruit on his tallywacker. John a little shocked, tries his best to figure out what Jacques is supposed to be, but just can't figure it out. So he finally gives in and says "Ok Jacques you got me, what emotion are you supposed to be?" Jacques proudly proclaims "I am deep in dis pear" and heads into the party.

[Jimjamesak]

My spouse and I were playing bridge with the Obamas. Every time Barry bid for a contract, we were able to prevent him from taking enough tricks.

Ah, the pleasure that comes with setting a President.....

It's "Really Terrible Puns" not "Lame Political Puns".

A guy was walking along the beach when he came across a woman with no arms and no legs crying. He asked her what was wrong and she replied "well I've never been *ed". The guy looked at her and said "well I can take of that!" So he picked her up and threw her in the water. He yelled out "there! Now your *ed!"

[FreshFish]

Re: Really Terrible Puns Vol 1

It's "Really Terrible Puns" not "Lame Political Puns".

Perhaps you merely are unfamiliar with bridge terminology? If you "set" the other team, it means you prevent them from making the contract that they bid for. No politics involved at all.

[goldy_331]

Re: Really Terrible Puns Vol 1

Q: Why does the flourescent light fixture hum?

A: Because it does not know the words.

A really terrible joke is not a pun. Silly BADger.

[gmann]

Re: Really Terrible Puns Vol 1

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.


A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

[Jimjamesak]

Perhaps you merely are unfamiliar with bridge terminology? If you "set" the other team, it means you prevent them from making the contract that they bid for. No politics involved at all.

No I got that. I prefer spades myself. The use of Obama, given your other posts around here, made it lame.

[FreshFish]

Re: Really Terrible Puns Vol 1

No I got that. I prefer spades myself. The use of Obama, given your other posts around here, made it lame.

So it wasn't lame when I told exactly the same joke about Reagan, or GHWB, or Mr Cigar, or GWB??

[Jimjamesak]

So it wasn't lame when I told exactly the same joke about Reagan, or GHWB, or Mr Cigar, or GWB??

No, it'd still be lame.

[FreshFish]

Re: Really Terrible Puns Vol 1

No, it'd still be lame.

so how else to work the "president" part in there?

[jmh]

Re: Really Terrible Puns Vol 1

so how else to work the "president" part in there?

I don't think the problem is the politics, I think the problem is it's just not funny.

No, it'd still be lame.

But then, the title of the thread is "Really Terrible Puns" so maybe we should just let it slide.